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Why Men Are Never Depressed

 
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  #1  
Old
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Join Date: January 18th, 2005
Location: Mansfield, TX
Posts: 16,081
Why Men Are Never Depressed

Men Are Just Happier People -- What do you expect from such simple creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental $100. People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time.

Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.

You can play with toys all your life. One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.

You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.
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  #2  
Old
Life is Supposed to be Fun!
Join Date: January 18th, 2005
Location: Los Angeles
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HA! Yeah - no wonder! :-)
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  #3  
Old
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Join Date: December 15th, 2010
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lols.....
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  #4  
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Join Date: November 20th, 2005
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Good one...
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  #5  
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Priceless!!!! LOL!
  #6  
Old
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Certainly makes sense...and might I add....you can step over the pile of dirty clothes on the floor without even flinching, and paper plates are just to fine to eat on during the Holidays.
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  #7  
Old
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Join Date: January 18th, 2005
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"Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack."

That is IF you wear any...
  #8  
Old
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Join Date: January 18th, 2005
Location: In Razerback country.
Posts: 1,911
Too bad it's not really a joke....


Saw this posted as a Facebook status this morning and almost cried... I wanted to shout from a mountaintop - "WHO SAID that's the definition of a real woman?!!!"

style="margin:20px; margin-top:5px; ">
Quote:
A real woman always has a clean house, empty laundry basket, is well made-up, smells good, slim, healthy, eloquent and is perfectly well-behaved. Copy this status if you are beginning to suspect that you are a man!
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