Results 1 to 2 of 2
  1. #1
    Join Date
    June 6th, 2007
    Pilot Checklist
    After every flight, pilots fill out a form, called a gripe sheet which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some maintenance complaints submitted by pilots and the solutions recorded by maintenance engineers. By the way, the airline these came from is the only major airline that has never, ever, had an accident.

    Pilot: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
    Engineers: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

    Pilot: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
    Engineers: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

    Pilot: Something loose in cockpit.
    Engineers: Something tightened in cockpit.

    Pilot: Dead bugs on windshield.
    Engineers: Live bugs on back-order.

    Pilot: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
    Engineers: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

    Pilot: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
    Engineers: Evidence removed.

    Pilot: DME volume unbelievably loud.
    Engineers: DME volume set to more believable level.

    Pilot: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
    Engineers: That's what friction locks are for.

    Pilot: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
    Engineers: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

    Pilot: Suspected crack in windshield.
    Engineers: Suspect you're right.

    Pilot: Number 3 engine missing.
    Engineers: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

    Pilot: Aircraft handles funny.
    Engineers: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

    Pilot: Target radar hums.
    Engineers: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

    Pilot: Mouse in cockpit.
    Engineers: Cat installed.

    Pilot: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
    Engineers: Took hammer away from midget

  2. #2
    Newbie E111ena's Avatar
    Join Date
    January 14th, 2008
    San Francisco
    haha, that is hilarious!!!

    and just to think we trust these people with our lives, lols

  3. Newsletter Signup

+ Reply to Thread

Similar Threads

  1. Merchants: 4th Quarter Checklist
    By Sarah - ShareASale in forum ShareASale - SAS
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: September 24th, 2010, 08:18 PM
  2. Perfect Web Marketing Checklist
    By lintlin in forum Marketing Resources & Power Tools
    Replies: 21
    Last Post: May 4th, 2010, 08:50 AM
  3. Brian's Incredible Camping Checklist
    By Carolyn - ShareASale in forum ShareASale - SAS
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: March 30th, 2006, 04:06 PM
  4. CHECKLIST for new program announcement
    By dogdecor in forum ShareASale - SAS
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: April 30th, 2004, 09:37 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts