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  1. #1
    Defender of Truth, Justice and the Affiliate Way
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    They have finally found a diagnosis for my condition.

    Hooray!! I have recently been diagnosed with
    A.A.A.D.D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit
    Disorder...

    This is how it goes -

    I decide to wash the car. I start toward the garage and notice the mail on the table. OK, I am going to wash the car, but first I'm going through the mail. I lay the car keys down on the desk, discard the junk mail and I notice the trash can is full.

    OK. I will just put the bills on my desk and take the trash can out, but since I'm going to be hear the mailbox anyway, I'll pay these few bills first. Now, where is my checkbook? Oops, there's only one check left. My extra checks are in my desk.

    Oh, there's the Dr. Pepper I was drinking. I'm going to look> for those checks, but first I need to put my drink further away from the computer, or maybe I'll pop it into the fridge
    to keep it cold for a while.

    I head towards the kitchen and my flowers catch my eye, they need some water. I set the drink on the counter and Uh Oh! There are my glasses. I was looking for them all morning! I'd better put them away first.

    I fill a container with water and head for the flowerpots -

    Aaaaaagh!! Someone left the TV remote in the kitchen. We'll never think to look in the kitchen tonight when we want to watch television, so I'd better put it back in the family room where it belongs.

    I splash some water into the pots and onto the floor, I throw the remote onto a soft cushion on the sofa and I head back down the hall trying to figure out what it was I was going to do.

    END OF DAY: The car isn't washed, the bills are unpaid, the Dr Pepper is sitting on the kitchen counter, the flowers are half watered, the checkbook still only has one check in it and I can't seen to find my car keys!

    When I try to figure out how come nothing got done today, I'm baffled because I KNOW I WAS BUSY ALL DAY LONG!!

    I realize this is a serious condition and I'll get help, BUT FIRST I think I'll check my e-mail.

    It's Your Money. You earned it. What are you going to do to make sure you get to keep it?

  2. #2
    ABW Ambassador DesignerWiz's Avatar
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    LMAO!!! Yep ... fairly accurate description of your symptoms B!!!

    Ray Thomas
    DesignerWiz.com CEO
    Development Resource & Javascript Public Archive Center
    http://DesignerWiz.com
    ABW Board: Category: Programming / Coding

  3. #3
    ABW Ambassador
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    At least you didn't miss the 200,000th post by only 1. Not that I am bitter or anything

    www.cjshoppingnetwork.com

  4. #4
    ABW Founder Haiko de Poel, Jr.'s Avatar
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    I can picture it now ...

    Where are my car keys?


    <font size="2" face="Verdana">Haiko


    The secret of success is constancy of purpose. ~ Disraeli
    </font></p>

  5. #5
    pph Expert! Gordon's Avatar
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    That is so funny B.
    The only thing I did not like about it was the fact it sounds very much like you followed me for a day and described it

    I got my parasiteware t-shirt
    <font color=red size="1">All parasites are scumbags and should be treated as such....</font><font color=blue size="1">STAMP EM OUT!!!</font>
    Take care
    YouTrek.com

  6. #6
    ABW Ambassador
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    Gordon, you mean B is about ready to join our Senior Moments Club?
    Cazzie

    Join the Fight! Parasite Free In 2003!

  7. #7
    ABW Ambassador
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    Senior Moments Club, mmm, now where was that note telling me all about it

    Jeez, gotta tidy up here. Ahhh, great, my keys, now I can unlock that box. Now where did I put that box

    ----------------------------
    If at first you don't succeed, Click, Click, Click, Click, Click, Click, Click.

  8. #8
    ABW Ambassador Nova's Avatar
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    Ms.B. you are the sunshine of ABW!
    You just made me giggle soooooo bad
    (Poon is sleeping can't make too much noise, poor thing have a grandson bday party today and didn't get but one hour sleep!) it hurts my back! went to the doc yesterday for my aching side. And I am on medication pain killer (no need for hormones for a couple of days! )
    what was I saying? geez i'm in the group!

    You funny G.I.Jane Ms.B.
    thanks for the laugh!

    ------------------------------
    What does the COC stand for? Crooks Overwriting Commissions.
    Don't worry! Tracking is infected!
    ------------------------------
    Love Life to the fullest. we only get ONE chance! :-) !

  9. #9
    Domain Addict / Formerly known as elbowcreek Thomas A. Rice's Avatar
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    Very funny, B! Glad I'm not the only one that stuff happens too!

    - - - - - - - - -
    This is your affiliate network -
    This is your affiliate network on Parasites -

  10. #10
    pph Expert! Gordon's Avatar
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    <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> Gordon, you mean B is about ready to join our Senior Moments Club? <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
    After reading that cazzie I think she was the founder of the club

    I got my parasiteware t-shirt
    <font color=red size="1">All parasites are scumbags and should be treated as such....</font><font color=blue size="1">STAMP EM OUT!!!</font>
    Take care
    YouTrek.com

  11. #11
    Defender of Truth, Justice and the Affiliate Way
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    At least I never misplace my link to ABW.

    It's Your Money. You earned it. What are you going to do to make sure you get to keep it?

  12. #12
    ABW Ambassador
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    I sometimes misplace whole days of the week and children.

    <font face=verdana size=1 color=43639C>Parasiteware - Any software, process or method that aims to make money by avoiding any involvement in the sales process apart from hijacking transactions that have been created by the hard work of others.</font>

  13. #13
    Affiliate Marketing Consultant Linda - 5starAffiliatePrograms's Avatar
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    B, if you decide to try to get help with your condition...
    PLEASE press #9 when you call the Mental Health Hotline

    "Hello, and welcome to the mental health hotline..."

    - If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.

    - If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

    - If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.

    - If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

    - If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transferred to the mother ship.

    - If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.

    - If you are a manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no one will answer.

    - If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696.

    - If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the pound key until a representative comes on the line.

    - If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, telephone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's maiden name.

    - If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, s-l-o-w-l-y & c-a-r-e-f-u-l-l-y press 0 0 0.

    - If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

    - If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. All operators are too busy to talk to you."

    - If you have you are having a senior moment with short-term memory loss, press 9.
    - If you have you are having a senior moment with short-term memory loss, press 9.
    - If you have you are having a senior moment with short-term memory loss, press 9.
    - If you have you are having a senior moment with short-term memory loss, press 9.

    - If you have.... what number was I on?



    Linda Buquet :: Affiliate Management Consultant :: Catalyst eMarketing.com
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    [This message was edited by Catalyst on September 06, 2003 at 08:33 PM.]

  14. #14
    ABW Ambassador flamingoworld's Avatar
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    Ms. B..Are you sure you don't have a spycam at my house??
    Freaky. I thought it was just me! It is so reassuring to know I am not alone.

    Connie Berg
    http://www.flamingoworld.com


  15. #15
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    Lol. This describes a normal day for me..

    Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible..

  16. #16
    2005 Linkshare Golden Link Award Winner  ecomcity's Avatar
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    Now where did I put my spare keys? Old Time Cowboys and Indians never had this problem ...it comes from assimulating into modern society. My rational for all this is ....if I lost it it wasn't that important anyway.

    Hilarious Ms.B You aught to write for the Onion. Life is all about Smiles & Crys with a few deams thrown in.

    Mike & Charlie ...

    If they won't adopt and feed a bird ..flip them one! BBQ some Gator and remember to flush WhenU..

  17. #17
    ABW Ambassador
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    Ms B. thanks, finally I have a name for my disease. But does this really help to find my keys? Or was I looking for my newspaper?


    carneol

  18. #18
    Affiliate Manager
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    Laugh out loud funny Ms. B

    Unfortunately, a few too many of us here seem to have the same symptoms...

    Jessica Hutson
    Senior Manager of Affiliate Relations/Development
    Interactive Affiliate Network
    A parasite free contract since June 2001
    http://ian.com

  19. #19
    ABW Ambassador
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    Be very, very careful Mrs B. Next thing you know, you'll be pulling up a chair to play checkers with me an Gordon. Gordon may not appreciate it too much....I heard some mumbling about women in the checkers competition...something about nagging and the smell of baby powder

    TH Media-Web Solutions For The Small Business
    Check Out The TH Media Affiliate Program

  20. #20
    ABW Ambassador Andy's Avatar
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    I dunno, Ms. B. Sounds like a fairly normal (if uneventful) day to me!

    ...now what was I doing before I read this thread???

    Andy

    _______________
    "If you were born to be shot, you'll never be hung." -Unknown

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