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  1. #1
    Grandma broke her coccyx! Uncle Rico's Avatar
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    Got "The Bird" flipped at Me by.....
    a little old lady in a Honda Accord. This lady was easily in her late 60's to early 70's. I am still unclear as to what her problem was. I was driving on the freeway in the center lane doing about 70 mph. My SUV has really dark tint all the way around so I know she couldn't see inside. I just happen to look to my right and notice this really old lady struggling to keep her car in her lane while flipping me the bird and mouthing something at the same time that I couldn't possibly hear.

    It was quite funny. I wish I had a camera so I could have captured her demeaner. I honestly have no idea what I could have possibly done, but I did not respond. I would have had to roll down the passenger window for her to actually see my response. I decided it was just too funny and not worth a reaction on my part. I don't know, may she just need some more cowbell.

    That's my fun story of the day!

  2. #2
    ABW Veteran Mr. Sal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SeymourButts
    a little old lady in a Honda Accord. This lady was easily in her late 60's to early 70's. I am still unclear as to what her problem was. I was driving on the freeway in the center lane doing about 70 mph. My SUV has really dark tint all the way around so I know she couldn't see inside. I just happen to look to my right and notice this really old lady struggling to keep her car in her lane while flipping me the bird and mouthing something at the same time that I couldn't possibly hear.
    Come on!

    How can you say that you're still unclear as to what her problem was?

    There you go flying at 70 mph on your SUV with real dark tinted windows all the way around your car, and just passed that very poor old lady a few miles back, what were you thinking?

    Maybe you just gave that poor old lady a heart attack a few seconds before, so be happy that she just did this to you, she could just easily just pulled you out of your SUV and beat the out of you if she was younger.


    Btw, I thought the speed limit still 55, so you're lucky you don't also got a ticket, too!


  3. #3
    Affiliate Manager Alan Hamilton's Avatar
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    Too funny Seymour. Did it ever occur to you that she may have dipped into a little of the cooking sherry and that's why she had trouble staying in her lane?

    Sal, the speed limit on most freeways in the U.S. is 70 or 75, so get yourself up to date!! LOL
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  4. #4
    ABW Ambassador Boom or Bust's Avatar
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    Maybe she's an eco-terrorist...



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  5. #5
    Grandma broke her coccyx! Uncle Rico's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Sal
    Come on!
    Btw, I thought the speed limit still 55, so you're lucky you don't also got a ticket, too!
    Speed limit is 65 and I didn't pass her. She came up behind/beside me.

  6. #6
    Best New ABW Member 2007 sfcom's Avatar
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    I would have put the window down and gave her a thumbs up.

    You wouldn't happen to drive a Hummer H2 would you? If so, that might very well explain it.

    -sfcom


  7. #7
    Affiliate Manager Alan Hamilton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SeymourButts
    Speed limit is 65 and I didn't pass her. She came up behind/beside me.
    Maybe when you tossed the empty beer can out your window, it hit her car? More cowbell!!!
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  8. #8
    ABW Veteran Mr. Sal's Avatar
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    Sal, the speed limit on most freeways in the U.S. is 70 or 75, so get yourself up to date!! LOL
    I know that, but as you can see...

    Speed limit is 65 and I didn't pass her. She came up behind/beside me.
    So I was right, he was driving 5 miles over the speed limit, and while he may just get a warning for that if he got pull over by a good cop, he could easily may have received a ticket for having a tint darker than allowed by law, and also another ticket for every one else on that SUV that was not wearing the seat belt.

  9. #9
    Grandma broke her coccyx! Uncle Rico's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Sal
    So I was right, he was driving 5 miles over the speed limit, and while he may just get a warning for that if he got pull over by a good cop, he could easily may have received a ticket for having a tint darker than allowed by law, and also another ticket for every one else on that SUV that was not wearing the seat belt.
    Oh good grief.

  10. #10
    Affiliate Manager Alan Hamilton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SeymourButts
    Oh good grief.
    Yeah Seymour - what the heck, you were driving 5 miles over the 55 speed limit Sal referenced? Shame on you!! LOL I need more co- - - oh forget it!
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  11. #11
    ABW Ambassador superCool's Avatar
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    well at least now you won't feel so bad when you flip off old ladies

    superCool adores the elderly....but sometimes they do deserve a good bird
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  12. #12
    ABW Ambassador writerguy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SeymourButts
    Speed limit is 65 and I didn't pass her. She came up behind/beside me.

    Ah, well then. That really explains it: You were slowing her down and she was obviously irritated that you were in her way. MOVE ASIDE BOY!!!
    Generate more fake news.

  13. #13
    Troll Killer and best Snooper!
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    This is my favorite little old lady story.

    I was having a garage sale. Two middle-aged women were looking at some costume jewelry and chatting. They were blocking access to the costume jewelry by a tiny little woman whose age I'd guess to be 80-something.

    I could see that little old lady was fuming and I wondered if I should say something to the obtuse middle-aged women when little old lady booms out, "Listen you two. Quit yakking and get out of my way. I didn't get to be this age by letting fools like you **** with me."

    The garage went deadly silent. I gasped. The middle-aged women fled. Little old lady bought nothing.

    From that point on I started loudly offering customers a "10 percent courtesy discount." They inevitably asked, "Courtesy discount for what?" to which I replied, I'm giving you a discount for BEING courteous. After that everyone behaved themselves.

  14. #14
    ABW Ambassador superCool's Avatar
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    great story about the garage sale

  15. #15
    What's the word? Rhia7's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SeymourButts
    I just happen to look to my right and notice this really old lady struggling to keep her car in her lane while flipping me the bird and mouthing something at the same time that I couldn't possibly hear.
    That sounds a lot like my favorite joke
    Honk if you love Jesus

    Got a letter from Grandma the other day. She writes...

    The other day I went up to a local Christian bookstore and saw a "Honk if you love Jesus" bumper sticker.

    I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting, so I bought the sticker and put it on my bumper.

    Boy, I'm glad I did! What an uplifting experience that followed!

    I was stopped at a red light at a busy intersection, just lost in thought about the Lord and how good He is... and I didn't notice that the light had changed.

    It is a good thing someone else loves Jesus because if he hadn't honked, I'd never have noticed!

    I found that LOTS of people love Jesus! Why, while I was sitting there, the guy behind started honking like crazy, and then he leaned out of his window and screamed, "For the love of GOD! GO! GO! Jesus Christ, GO!"

    What an exuberant cheerleader he was for Jesus! Everyone started honking!

    I just leaned out of my window and started waving and smiling at all these loving people. I even honked my horn a few times to share in the love!

    There must have been a man from Florida back there because I heard him yelling something about a "sunny beach"...

    I saw another guy waving in a funny way with only his middle finger stuck up in the air.

    Then I asked my teenage grandson in the back seat what that meant, he said that it was probably a Hawaiian good luck sign or something. Well, I've never met anyone from Hawaii, so I leaned out the window and gave him the good luck sign back.

    My grandson burst out laughing...why, even he was enjoying this religious experience!

    A couple of the people were so caught up in the joy of the moment that they got out of their cars and started walking towards me. I bet they wanted to pray or ask what church I attended, but this is when I noticed the light had changed.

    So, I waved to all my sisters and brothers grinning, and drove on through the intersection. I noticed I was the only car that got through the intersection before the light changed again and I felt kind of sad that I had to leave them after all the love we had shared, so I slowed the car down, leaned out of the window and gave them all the Hawaiian good luck sign one last time as I drove away.

    Praise the Lord for such wonderful folks!

    Grandma
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  16. #16
    Merchant & ABW Ambassador
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    Maybe she thought that u r working for the secret service and carrying some important person.

  17. #17
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boomers
    Maybe she's an eco-terrorist...
    HAHAHAHAHA good one Boomers!

    LOL @ the old lady, too. Had to have ben a jaw dropping moment.

    Anyone good with graphics or cartoons? Just the visual is hilarious, no need to explain it.
    Peace,

    Rexanne

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  18. #18
    SEO: A Specialty - Web Design: Slow or outsourced andbeyond's Avatar
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    I am sure she was an eco terrorist. There is a rash of SUV defacings in cities like San Fran or London.

    The stupid thing is that people don't like that they are possibly a little unclean. So they scratch the paint by keying it. The owner goes to the body shop and they release organic VOCs into the air repairing and repainting it.

    Dumb misguided politically correct busy bodies.

  19. #19
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by andbeyond

    Dumb misguided politically correct busy bodies.
    Screaming do gooders who have no clue how hypocritical they are because they're stupid and too busy minding everyone else's busineess instead of their own. LOL
    Peace,

    Rexanne

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  20. #20
    Affiliate Manager Alan Hamilton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rexanne
    Screaming do gooders who have no clue how hypocritical they are because they're stupid and too busy minding everyone else's busineess instead of their own. LOL
    Don't sugar-coat it Rex!Tell us what you really think!
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  21. #21
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alan Hamilton
    Don't sugar-coat it Rex!Tell us what you really think!
    Would you expect less? LOL
    Peace,

    Rexanne

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  22. #22
    Ride It Like You Stole It CowgirlUp's Avatar
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    I would have been traumatized by an old lady passing me and flipping me the bird!

    Although once I did mouth off to an elderly lady at a garage sale (wonder if it was the same one Rhea!) We had a nice conversation about yard ornaments and she told me how her gnomes were stolen. I totally resisted any travelocity jokes and changed the subject to gardening. I put myself out there and admitted that every Aloe plant I have ever owned died.

    After she made her purchases and said goodbye to my friends having the garage sale, she turned to me and hissed "Aloe Killer!"

    I was stunned! So I shouted back "Irresponsible gnome owner!" I felt better annnnd my friends bought me a six-pack for having the best comeback of the day!
    Last edited by CowgirlUp; July 1st, 2008 at 02:25 PM. Reason: punctuation
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  23. #23
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
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    LOL Amy - geeeze, little old ladies offer some good laughs at their expense.
    Peace,

    Rexanne

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    Loving Everyone's Child Creates Magic


  24. #24
    ABW Ambassador Boom or Bust's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rexanne
    LOL Amy - geeeze, little old ladies offer some good laughs at their expense.
    You little old ladies in training, watch and remember...



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  25. #25
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Boomers
    You little old ladies in training, watch and remember...
    Good point.
    Peace,

    Rexanne

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    Loving Everyone's Child Creates Magic


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