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  1. #1
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Los Angeles
    New Stock Market Terms for 2008
    NEW STOCK MARKET TERMS for 2008 . . . and possibly beyond:

    CEO --Chief Embezzlement Officer.

    CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer.

    BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.

    BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.

    VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.

    P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.

    BROKER -- What my broker has made me.

    STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell.

    STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.

    STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.

    FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected.

    MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks.

    CASH FLOW-- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.

    YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.

    WINDOWS -- What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought Yahoo @ $240 per share.

    INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR -- Past year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse.

    PROFIT -- An archaic word no longer in use.

    Loving Everyone's Child Creates Magic

  2. #2
    Beachy Bill's Avatar
    Join Date
    November 20th, 2005
    Good one, Rexanne.

    Unfortunately the first couple of terms have been that way for quite a while with some [too many] companies.
    Bill / Marketing Blog @ 12PM - Current project: Resurrecting my "baby" at South Baltimore..
    Cute Personal Checks and Business Checks
    If you are too busy to laugh you are too busy.

  3. #3
    ABW Ambassador
    Join Date
    March 2nd, 2007
    Good one, Rexanne

  4. #4
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    August 25th, 2009

  5. #5
    ABW Ambassador JoyUnltd's Avatar
    Join Date
    January 19th, 2005
    Emerald City
    This is a good chuckle! That is, if you don't play the market.
    Pay no attention to that woman behind the curtain. -Wizardress of Oz

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