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  1. #1
    Affiliate Manager Alan Hamilton's Avatar
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    There is “One” in every crowd – you may even be ONE!
    We all know that “one” in every crowd. We see them all the time. We may even each BE one of them in some way at some point or another! What are your favorite “one in every crowd” stories? I’ll start it out with two of my favorites.

    #1 The frequent flyer

    I’ve flown on commercial airlines countless times over the years and on EVERY flight I have ever been on, that ONE (or sometimes more) is on the flight. It’s like the changing of the ocean tides, the laws of nature…

    The aircraft lands, makes its way down the runway, turns onto the taxi way and taxis toward the arrival gate. As it does, the flight crew announces the landing, local time and temperature, and then says something like: “please stay seated until the aircraft comes to a complete stop and the captain turns off the seat belt sign.” The aircraft pulls up and just before it moves the last several yards to line up with the mobile departure ramp, that ONE stands up and goes for the overhead! Of course, when that ONE stands, a couple others usually take his/her que and follows. Like clockwork, a flight attendants voice comes over the speakers with something like: “ladies and gentlemen, please stay seated until the captain signals that we have come to a complete stop.” The offender (aka: The ONE) generally gets a sheepish look on their face, sits down and then offers the all too predictable comments to those around them: “I thought we were stopped.”

    # 2 - The drunken tourist promising a better life.

    On every vacation in Mexico and/or the Caribbean, at some point I observe that ONE (“I’m having the time of my life”) drunk at the Cabana bar telling his/her wait person or bartender how they are going to bring them home to the U.S. with them and how they are going to hook them up with a great job etc, blah blah. When they sober up, they generally don’t hit that cabana again!! LOL
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  2. #2
    Staril - Mad Cat Woman Sue's Avatar
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    I've seen 2 outstanding variations of #1

    #1a The guy who stood up and open the overhead locker just after the plane had landed and was still on the runway ... "But everyong does this in Africa" ... I think we had just landed somewhere in the US.

    #1b The elderly man who decided to wander down the aisle, presumably to visit the toilet, about 2 minutes before the plane was due to land. He ignored all requests to sit down ... I presume they caught him in time at the back of the plane.


    Why is it always men???


    Sue ducks .............

  3. #3
    Affiliate Manager Alan Hamilton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sue
    I've seen 2 outstanding variations of #1

    #1a The guy who stood up and open the overhead locker just after the plane had landed and was still on the runway ... "But everyong does this in Africa" ... I think we had just landed somewhere in the US.

    #1b The elderly man who decided to wander down the aisle, presumably to visit the toilet, about 2 minutes before the plane was due to land. He ignored all requests to sit down ... I presume they caught him in time at the back of the plane.

    Why is it always men??? Sue ducks .............
    No need to duck Sue, I think you are right and I have a theory as to why this is true...

    I surmise that women are more programmed / subserviant, and as such, they are much more apt to be guided by prompts and ques. On the other hand, men are more prone to spontaneous adventure and challenge. One follows the path while another cuts a path of their own. Pretty complicated stuff so a lot of the girls may not comprehend it all!!!
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  4. #4
    Staril - Mad Cat Woman Sue's Avatar
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    We might not comprehend it but we may well smack you

  5. #5
    ABW Ambassador meadowmufn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alan Hamilton
    #1 The frequent flyer

    I’ve flown on commercial airlines countless times over the years and on EVERY flight I have ever been on, that ONE (or sometimes more) is on the flight. It’s like the changing of the ocean tides, the laws of nature…

    The aircraft lands, makes its way down the runway, turns onto the taxi way and taxis toward the arrival gate. As it does, the flight crew announces the landing, local time and temperature, and then says something like: “please stay seated until the aircraft comes to a complete stop and the captain turns off the seat belt sign.” The aircraft pulls up and just before it moves the last several yards to line up with the mobile departure ramp, that ONE stands up and goes for the overhead! Of course, when that ONE stands, a couple others usually take his/her que and follows. Like clockwork, a flight attendants voice comes over the speakers with something like: “ladies and gentlemen, please stay seated until the captain signals that we have come to a complete stop.” The offender (aka: The ONE) generally gets a sheepish look on their face, sits down and then offers the all too predictable comments to those around them: “I thought we were stopped.”
    I WISH the ONE on my last flight had sat down sheepishly. He popped up a few seconds before the plane stopped, and as those in front of him were trying to get their carry-ons, he tried to mow down a woman, two children, and a granny until the man in front of them confronted him. The guy was a total nightmare and unfortunately was sitting at the end of our row. The entire flight he was either 1) snoring or 2) complaining so loud the entire plane could hear him. My poor hubby was so disgusted by the guy that he nearly sat in my lap the whole flight (I had the window seat). LOL.
    -Don't criticize anyone til you've walked a mile in their shoes. Then when you do criticize them, you'll be a mile away and have their shoes.
    - Silence is golden. Duct Tape is silver.

  6. #6
    Affiliate Manager Alan Hamilton's Avatar
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    #3 The only car in the lot that matters.

    You pull into a parking lot. It is packed, so you drive up and down each row looking for a spot. Ah yes, the inevitable car (or pickup truck) that has taken two spots.

    #4 The "two seat" movie goer.

    You get to the theatre and it's nearly full. You notice two seats near the middle of the row and so you and spouse excuse yourselves and make your way over. As you get there you see coats, purses or other items on the seats. When you ask the person on each side: "is this yours?" s/he grudgingly moves their junk like you are invading "their space."
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  7. #7
    Affiliate Manager Alan Hamilton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sue
    We might not comprehend it but we may well smack you
    Right on que Sue!!!~
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  8. #8
    ABW Ambassador meadowmufn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alan Hamilton
    #4 The "two seat" movie goer.

    You get to the theatre and it's nearly full. You notice two seats near the middle of the row and so you and spouse excuse yourselves and make your way over. As you get there you see coats, purses or other items on the seats. When you ask the person on each side: "is this yours?" s/he grudgingly moves their junk like you are invading "their space."
    This can apply to a number of places: theater, symphony, etc.

    The person who talks through EVERYTHING. I went to see John Williams at the Hollywood Bowl years ago. There was a lady behind us who talked through most of it. I and others near me only had to turn around about 4 dozen times to say "shhh" and give her the stare of death before it embarrassed her companions enough to convince her to shut up.
    -Don't criticize anyone til you've walked a mile in their shoes. Then when you do criticize them, you'll be a mile away and have their shoes.
    - Silence is golden. Duct Tape is silver.

  9. #9
    Affiliate Manager Alan Hamilton's Avatar
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    The unique weather in every state.

    There is always the ONE: "you know what they say about the weather in Alabama; if you don't like it, give it ten minutes and it will change" (which is the same exclusive claimed by the ONE in every state in the country) Yet the ONE thinks that it is an exclusive situation for Dayton or Baltimore, Boston, L.A. or you name it!!
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  10. #10
    Moderator leeann's Avatar
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    The person you barely know trying to think up conversation like, when they see you in a restaurant eating at 8 p.m. they ask, "So, are you having dinner?" or in the mall w/ bags in your hands, "Been shopping?" D'ohhhh
    leeann


    Shoppers determine what has value and they like coupons. Stop manipulating who set the cookie just because you do not like coupon and promotional sites.

  11. #11
    Affiliate Manager Alan Hamilton's Avatar
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    Ah yes, the ONE.....

    The ONE who inevitably joins ABW, doesn't research any threads for topics and then opens with:

    "Hi, I'm (fill in the name). Which is the best network to work with?" editors note: I'm working on a copy/paste version of repeated SAS endorsements given to this one over the years in order to save my fellow ABW'ers time! Or the ONE....

    "Hi, just joined. I'm brand new to Affiliate marketing. What is the hottest seller you all have so I can get started on the right foot?" LOL
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