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  1. #1
    ABW Ambassador La_Valette's Avatar
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    Funniest TOS restrictions ever
    One of the TOS restrictions for the new Scanna.com program on CJ:-

    we also do not allow to use spam, scam medthods, black seo,bad, dishonest, ****ing ,scammer,black, dishonorable, hairy,scammers,black list, escort, scamming,cheating, fallacious, scams, deceitful, false, porn, sham, deceiver, falsification, prostitute, wrestling, fraud, pussies, deception, fraudulent pussy, deceptive, ****

    Come on people, what's wrong with using just a little "fraudulent pussy" every now and then, eh?
    Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try. -- Homer Simpson

  2. #2
    ABW Ambassador
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    They left out TM Bidding

  3. #3
    ABW Ambassador
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Ward
    They left out TM Bidding
    May be its allowed.

  4. #4
    ABW Ambassador simcat's Avatar
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    ha!, I had to check that out for myself.

    classsssy

  5. #5
    ABW Ambassador La_Valette's Avatar
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    Can you imagine getting an email from an angry merchant accusing you of a "Fraudulent Pussy Violation"? Ok - I'm having too much fun with this
    Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try. -- Homer Simpson

  6. #6
    Grandma broke her coccyx! Uncle Rico's Avatar
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    wrestling? what about slap fighting?

  7. #7
    ABW Ambassador simcat's Avatar
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    Unhappy
    damn!, there goes my plans of using hairy wrestling prostitutes to promote their site.

  8. #8
    The "other" left wing davidh's Avatar
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    To those of us who have to depend on our steady stream of traffic from seekers of fraudulent pussy, this is no laughing matter at all. We all need to eat, you know.
    CUSTOM BANNERS by GRAPHICS CANDY ~ Banner Sets and Website Graphics ~ Professional design, reasonable rates
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  9. #9
    ABW Ambassador meadowmufn's Avatar
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    LOL. Ow. LOL. Not the best thread to read after abdominal surgery, but friggin' hilarious. ROFL.

    And for the record, I have never had a fraudulent pussy violation. Only authentic pussies for my visitors, thankyouverymuch!
    -Don't criticize anyone til you've walked a mile in their shoes. Then when you do criticize them, you'll be a mile away and have their shoes.
    - Silence is golden. Duct Tape is silver.

  10. #10
    ABW Ambassador Joshua's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Ward
    They left out TM Bidding
    Maybe it's just me, but I don't see any affiliates TM bidding, just competing sites...

  11. #11
    The "other" left wing davidh's Avatar
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    you will receive your commission each time your client makes a purchase (even 5-10 years from now)
    Action Referral Period 120 day(s)
    Guess they didn't look up the English definitions of "deceiver" and "falsification",
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  12. #12
    Grandma broke her coccyx! Uncle Rico's Avatar
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    From TOS on CJ:

    You can receive 40% in revenue, each time the client you brought us makes a purchase on Scanna.com.


    From Affiliate Signup Page on their Site:

    You receive 50% in revenue, each time the client you brought us makes a purchase on Scanna.com.


    They are good with numbers too.

  13. #13
    ABW Ambassador Greg Rice's Avatar
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    OMG, this is hilarious Guess I have to go and update our TOS. I'll do some research first because I don't know what fraudulent p**** is. Maybe I don't get out enough...
    Greg Rice Affiliate Program Management
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  14. #14
    The "other" left wing davidh's Avatar
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    I'll do some research first because I don't know what fraudulent p**** is
    Out there around Ohio these may be called "blow up love doll with realistic orifice" or something like that.
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  15. #15
    Outsourced Program Manager Chris -  AMWSO's Avatar
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    Okay after all that I had to check what they actually sell.....and now it all makes sense!

  16. #16
    Grandma broke her coccyx! Uncle Rico's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Greg Rice
    I'll do some research first because I don't know what fraudulent p**** is.
    Transvestite?

  17. #17
    ABW Ambassador Joshua's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Greg Rice
    I'll do some research first because I don't know what fraudulent p**** is. Maybe I don't get out enough...
    Seeing as this thread is the first Google result for that term, I think it doesn't have any meaning.

  18. #18
    ABW Ambassador delsol's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Greg Rice
    OMG, this is hilarious Guess I have to go and update our TOS. I'll do some research first because I don't know what fraudulent p**** is. Maybe I don't get out enough...
    You don't have to go out. Just rent the Oscar winning movie "The Crying Game" ;-)

    This is DA scene where the meaning of "fraudulent p****" makes sense:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YLM6Y...eature=related

    Too funny...Thanks fo sharing this TOS...

    PS: I think there is a version out there where you actually see more details (hum... hum... you know the "frank and beans)".

  19. #19
    Moderator BurgerBoy's Avatar
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    Cool
    Quote Originally Posted by davidh
    Out there around Ohio these may be called "blow up love doll with realistic orifice" or something like that.
    How do you know???????

    Vietnam Veteran 1966-1970 USASA
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  20. #20
    ABW Ambassador delsol's Avatar
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    yea davidh how do you know man!

    Also the meaning of "realistic orifice" is probably relative to one person's standards... if you know what I mean.

    too funny.

  21. #21
    The "other" left wing davidh's Avatar
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    Hey, I'm a professional affiliate marketer. I know how to home in on those TIGHT NICHES.
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  22. #22
    Full Member snappy's Avatar
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    awww russian brides.....so all those nasty tos but yet they are promoting a kind of fraud and most likely human traffiking. Why doesn't cj ban them for their tos. Sales of humans is up in russia and the world. Sick company, sick terms I hope some of us report them. I know I am right now. how do you look at the tos? is it when you go and click the join button? if so none popped up it just accepted me?
    Last edited by snappy; April 28th, 2009 at 07:29 AM.

  23. #23
    Grandma broke her coccyx! Uncle Rico's Avatar
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    looks like they cleaned up some of the filth from their TOS

  24. #24
    ABW Ambassador La_Valette's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SeymourButts
    looks like they cleaned up some of the filth from their TOS
    Indeed. (Though they're still promising a 5-10 year cookie life (!) with their action referral period actually set to 120 days, as somebody in this thread earlier pointed out.)
    Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try. -- Homer Simpson

  25. #25
    general fuq mrbshouse's Avatar
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    and i thought i was on the cutting edge with my game plan, how can they even tell i'm using fraudulent pussy in my campaign?

    I better rethink this one hahahaha

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