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  1. #1
    Ride It Like You Stole It CowgirlUp's Avatar
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    I hope I don't end up on Jerry!
    This is just too funny not to share, and it's true!!! LOL

    So it's no big secret I live in very rural Ohio, you now the drill, everyone knows everyone or is related. When me and my soon to be ex-spouse (still trying to get divorced...lol) split up 2 years ago and he left the state to live with his mistress I became extremely single and celibate for a year and a half. I was the president of the she-woman man haters club! LOL

    Then out of nowhere I was contacted by a guy I hadn't spoken to since my ex had taken off and asked me to dinner. I had known this guy for nearly 8 years, we at one time were really good friends and I had always thought he was just sexier than socks on a rooster (he owns a logging company and drives a log truck....so he's like one of those hotties from Axe Men) so of course I accepted!! But there was a catch.......he's my still technically husbands cousin.

    What followed was a very hot and heavy fling that resulted in me becoming pregnant after 1 month.....ooops! So here I am 29 weeks pregnant with my husband's cousin's child. And while me and logger hottie are no longer together we remain good friends. So here is how the screwed up family tree will break down:
    My soon to be ex husband will be my baby's cousin
    My father in law will be my baby's uncle (and they also want to be grandparents since they still consider me their daughter in law)
    My aunt and uncle by marriage will also be my son's grandparents

    Oh yeah, I gotta move back to the city ASAP!! LOL, kinda gives meaning to the phrase "keeping it in the family" doesn't it? Jeff Foxworthy would be so proud!! Feel free to let the redneck jokes fly
    Be the change you want to see in the world ~ Gandhi

  2. #2
    Beachy Bill's Avatar
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    OK - Ive got all that. HUH?

    For a while (a long time ago) we did the coffee-house/folk-music thing here the the Baltimore/Annapolis area. I've heard a variety of folk singers perform this: I'm My Own Grandpa. (This version on Youtube actually diagrams how that can happen. )

    All kidding aside, here's wishing you the best. You will soon have a wonderful new baby in your life to love and to cherish. Congratz.
    Last edited by Bill; May 14th, 2010 at 08:43 AM. Reason: added comment
    Bill / Marketing Blog @ 12PM - Current project: Resurrecting my "baby" at South Baltimore..
    Cute Personal Checks and Business Checks
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  3. #3
    Mama in Charge Anne's Avatar
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    OMG.. too funny... Just wait a few months. The logger will have a toothless gf who is going to kick your arse when she finds out the logger wants to dump her and get back with you. Meanwhile, you will be stripping to make money to pay the future bills for the baby. lol.

    Anyway, stripper poles and angry women aside... You'll have a beautiful baby soon and a wonderful memory of a hawt logger. Most of us don't have that memory.. whaaaa! lol.

  4. #4
    Ride It Like You Stole It CowgirlUp's Avatar
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    good one Anne!! Yeah, fortunately have only gained 20lbs so I can get on the pole as soon as possible after my surgery LOL

    Haha Bill....I need to go look that up!
    Be the change you want to see in the world ~ Gandhi

  5. #5
    Beachy Bill's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CowgirlUp View Post
    ......Haha Bill....I need to go look that up!
    Don't need to "look it up" - the title in my post is linked to one example w/ good audio and visual. (...or CLICKY HERE)
    Bill / Marketing Blog @ 12PM - Current project: Resurrecting my "baby" at South Baltimore..
    Cute Personal Checks and Business Checks
    If you are too busy to laugh you are too busy.

  6. #6
    Ride It Like You Stole It CowgirlUp's Avatar
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    ahahaha!!! Sorry i missed that link before, (I'm at that wonderful stage of pregnancy where I'm a complete ditz and scatter brain....please forgive me) but that video is hysterical! And yeah, that about sums up the situation.
    Be the change you want to see in the world ~ Gandhi

  7. #7
    Full Member JCSupSvc's Avatar
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    Nice one Bill. The songs always been cute but the addition of the family tree, and of course it being Ray Stevens, makes this the best version yet.
    :rankn-scp John - This is our chosen profession. This is our way. This is what we do.

  8. #8
    Ride It Like You Stole It CowgirlUp's Avatar
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    and thank you for the congrats Aubrey and I are so excited to have a new addition to our family. The last few years have been tough but the moment we found out I was pregnant we were ecstatic because 2 years after she was born I was told I couldn't have anymore. So little Alex is our miracle baby....despite he being half red/roughneck. LOL
    Be the change you want to see in the world ~ Gandhi

  9. #9
    ABW Veteran Mr. Sal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CowgirlUp View Post
    I hope I don't end up on Jerry!

    This is just too funny not to share, and it's true!!! LOL
    Well, you can forget about Jerry, for now!.......
    Quote Originally Posted by CowgirlUp
    When me and my soon to be ex-spouse (still trying to get divorced...lol) split up 2 years ago
    Before your ex-spouse would sign the divorce pappers, he might want to call Cheaters.com first, that way he may not have to give you of the house, or bank account...
    Quote Originally Posted by CowgirlUp
    So here I am 29 weeks pregnant with my husband's cousin's child
    Be very careful, because your husband's cousin may take you to the Maury Povich Show after the new child is born... (You still have about 11 more weeks to learn about the show script...)
    Quote Originally Posted by CowgirlUp
    So here is how the screwed up family tree will break down:
    My soon to be ex husband will be my baby's cousin
    My father in law will be my baby's uncle (and they also want to be grandparents since they still consider me their daughter in law)
    My aunt and uncle by marriage will also be my son's grandparents
    By the end of August or mid-September, you all should be ready for the Jerry Springer Show, not before...

    Btw, all this makes good writing material for a new book!

    "Diary of a Farm Girl" or, "Sex in the Hills" or, "Ohio's Cowgirl Love Story"...

    Who knows, maybe a couple of years from now if the book is good, you may even end up on Oprah, too!


    --------------------------

    EDIT: Wait a minute, Forget Oprah! She's quitting her show, this is her last season.

  10. #10
    Ride It Like You Stole It CowgirlUp's Avatar
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    Oprah here I come!!

    LOL, I guess I should have included the follow up on the person my husband left me for. She was a bartender, built more manly than he is, that walked out on her 6 children to live on the road with him. WOW!!! A person seriously couldn't make this crap up! Maybe I should start a daytime series. I could call it "As the tractor wheel turns" or something hehehe
    Be the change you want to see in the world ~ Gandhi

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