Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 36
  1. #1
    ABW Ambassador
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    641
    My real world friends and family will think I'm a geek , so here I am ...

    Can someone help me think up a real good lie for not updating a freebies site for about 5-6 weeks ?

    I was going to just let it die and never look back, but I'm getting emails like : Are you okay Lisa ? Are you going to be adding new freebies soon ? Blah, Blah, Blah, Blah, BLAH and stuff like that !

    I was going to say that I was on an African Safari , but that doesn't sound too believable.

    What about I was in the hospital ? Kidnapped ?

    I need a real good excuse , something that will make me look good - LOL !

  2. #2
    Affiliate Manager frankodelic's Avatar
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    867
    Lisa,

    I've always liked, "My dog ate it." Unfortunatly, I don't think that one's gonna work out for you here. Good luck!

    Frank
    UrbanScooters.com
    UrbanScooters.com Affiliate Program

  3. #3
    Member
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    97
    Why not... I just visited my Eye Doctor, and he says I need to dramatically reduce my computer time..

  4. #4
    ABW Ambassador mousejockey's Avatar
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    2,494
    Why not baffle them with something geeky like you've been doing 'backend maintainence'...

    I'm sure some of the members here can come out with some appropriate mindblowing cyber babble

    "I haven't failed, I've just found 10,000 reasons why it doesn't work"
    Thomas Edison

  5. #5
    ABW Ambassador
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Location
    Madrid
    Posts
    758
    mousejockey gets my vote

  6. #6
    ABW Founder Haiko de Poel, Jr.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Location
    New York
    Posts
    21,609
    How about .... I've been working on a discount site with amazon (using www.c3scripts.com - buy and install) and ... here it is!!!!

    As Lex once said ... SELL, SELL, SELL and I see a great opportunity to upsell here!

    <font size="2" face="Verdana">Haiko


    The secret of success is constancy of purpose. ~ Disraeli
    </font></p>

  7. #7
    ABW Ambassador
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    1,916
    I like mousejockey's 'backend

    maintenance'...

    ----
    -J
    Merchants: Do you realize that some of your affiliates are being paid commission on sales which you have paid for via PPC, offline advertising, and your targeted mailings?

  8. #8
    ABW Ambassador
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    641
    Hmmmm.... The eye doctor, that's a good one MisterUnz .

    I think I MAY just say that I had that LASIK eye surgery ( to get rid of the contacts and glasses), and on the doctors orders, I had to stay away from the computer monitor for a few weeks .

    I was kind of considering that procedure one of these days anyway, so it wouldn't be such a BIG lie . Just hope no one asks me questions about it

  9. #9
    ABW Ambassador
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    641
    Hey Haiko,
    Long time no speak !

    I wish I knew what to do with those scripts , I'd be your buyer , but I don't know what to do with scripts of any kind .

    It's sad, i know. I am selling and doing fairly well now, but still using the OLD FASHIONED method of one page at a time site building .

  10. #10
    Super Sh!t Stirrer SSanf's Avatar
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    9,944
    Hackers from Yemen changed your password and you have been locked out. You had to get help from the FBI to get back into your site.

    The Wolf Credo: Respect the elders. Teach the young. Cooperate with the pack. Play when you can. Hunt when you must. Rest in between. Share your affections. Voice your feelings. Leave your mark.

  11. #11
    ABW Ambassador
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    641
    Wow, I like that lie even better SSanf , that sounds like a real possibility.

    I'm going to sleep on it , and use which ever feels most comfortable in the morning, thanks .

  12. #12
    pph Expert! Gordon's Avatar
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Location
    Edmonton Canada
    Posts
    5,781
    A last minute one here Lisa
    You could tell em all your fingers fell off due to frostbite but then you'd always have to wear mittens not so plausible eh?

    hows about your house was burgled and the thief stole all your files? No! you are hard to please

    ok then, Due to you doing too much backend maintainance you had to go to the eye doctor, whilst you were visiting him some burglers broke into your house but luckily your dog ate them, but whilst the dog was feasting on them some hackers from the Yemen changed your password and the FBI have told you not to use your computer whilst their investigations are going on thus you cannot not upload the super script that Haiko got specially for you to update your site. So you had to take a trip to a friends to use their computer to try to update your siter, unfortunately this friend lives in the Northern Territories and you got frostbite on your fingers.

    Travel safe
    Gordon
    YouTrek

  13. #13
    ABW Ambassador Nova's Avatar
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Location
    home
    Posts
    2,395
    Gordon LOL....

    that's a good one!

    How about your server went out of business due to crashing the whole system and you lost all and have to start over again?

    Love Life to the fullest. we only get ONE chance! :-)

  14. #14
    ABW Founder Haiko de Poel, Jr.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Location
    New York
    Posts
    21,609
    <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Lisa:
    Hey Haiko,
    Long time no speak !

    I wish I knew what to do with those scripts , I'd be your buyer , but I don't know what to do with scripts of any kind .

    It's sad, i know. I am selling and doing fairly well now, but still using the OLD FASHIONED method of one page at a time site building .<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

    Too long Lisa!

    If you want I can do an ABW VIP deal for you (free) and help set you up on the phone ... SELL, SELL, SELL

    Yemen, or the other "cover-ups" just don't cut it for me, I think your loyal visitors will expect enhancements, not excuses! IMO

    PM ME for the "VIP deal".

    <font size="2" face="Verdana">Haiko


    The secret of success is constancy of purpose. ~ Disraeli
    </font></p>

  15. #15
    ABW Ambassador mousejockey's Avatar
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    2,494
    LOL! I like it Gordon...

    Of course it would have to be said in one breath

    "I haven't failed, I've just found 10,000 reasons why it doesn't work"
    Thomas Edison

  16. #16
    ABW Ambassador
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    641
    <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR> Yemen, or the other "cover-ups" just don't cut it for me, I think your loyal visitors will expect enhancements, not excuses! IMO<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>


    Darn it, Haiko... You woke up that other little voice in my head .
    Shame on me , what was I thinking ?

    I guess a good update IS in order , but I'm still going to lie


    If the offer still stands for help with the script in a week or so, that would be great .

    I need to get my act together and finish up a few things first before messing around with anything new .

    Thanks !

  17. #17
    ABW Ambassador
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Location
    United Kingdom
    Posts
    1,797
    Howz about this for an excuse, then...

    Due to changes in the way Google views the basic information architecture of websites, I have found it necessary to revise my link structure to incorporate a canonical approach more in keeping with their current thinking. Obviously, due to the ever-shifting nature of search engine algorithms, this taxonomical change is something that needs to be given a great deal of thought prior to implementation. Once the reorganization of the site architecture is complete, I will be adding new freebies.........Also, no one buys stuff from freebie sites, so I can't be bothered to update it

    Search Engine Positioning - 1 Design 4 Life

  18. #18
    ABW Ambassador Joey's Avatar
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    549
    <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by mousejockey:
    Why not baffle them with something geeky like you've been doing 'backend maintainence'...<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>It works for CJ...

  19. #19
    Affiliate Manager frankodelic's Avatar
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    867
    Lisa,

    The foolproof way to get whatever excuse you come up with across without question is to pepper it with "corporate e-bull." Go to the Web Economy BullSheeeeet Generator, click the "make bullsheeeeeeeet" button, and pepper your excuse with creative phrases from the list.

    Any CEO worth beans has this site bookmarked!



    Frank
    UrbanScooters.com
    UrbanScooters.com Affiliate Program

  20. #20
    ABW Ambassador
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    4,423
    Tell them you have been updating, but they must not have been clearing out their cache, you changed the page caching so it will now clear it out for them.

    Or blame it on DNS.

  21. #21
    Member
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    115
    Tell the the twins arrived early and you've been too busy trying to get some sleep..

    Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible..

  22. #22
    ABW Ambassador Mike O's Avatar
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Location
    Los Angeles area
    Posts
    843
    Y'know, I've got a site like that. It's only sold a couple of my software products in the last year.

    When I still had hope for it, and people would contact me with product-enhancement ideas for the software I was selling, I'd tell them "I'll put it on my list and consider it for the next revision."

    Now that I've decided that the product is never going to take off -- and never going to justify the effort to update it -- I just tell people that.

    I'll take their suggestions, but tell them that it's unlikely I'll ever upgrade the product, unless something very surprising happens to sales.

    The simplest and best answer is the truth.

    So why not just tell'em that -- that it doesn't make business sense to spend the time to keep the site going.

    I'd bet they'll understand that for you, this IS a business. And that it's a business decision, not a personal one.

    -- Mike

  23. #23
    ABW Ambassador Steveinid's Avatar
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    827
    I was thinking along the lines of MikeO but you would word it something like this.

    Due to time constraints and increasing competition I have been in negotiations with a partner site and will soon refer all traffic to that site. (This is where you insert my site name)

  24. #24
    ABW Ambassador
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    641
    After all that, this is the big excuse I used :

    "Back to updating the site again after several weeks of unavoidable absense ."

    I'll leave the excuse part up to their own imaginations.

    May I ask how the heck it is that so many of you manage to operate multiple sites , build new ones , and keep them all updated ?

    I just don't get it .

  25. #25
    Super Sh!t Stirrer SSanf's Avatar
    Join Date
    January 18th, 2005
    Posts
    9,944
    The answer is, it can't be done.

    Do it anyhow.

    The Wolf Credo: Respect the elders. Teach the young. Cooperate with the pack. Play when you can. Hunt when you must. Rest in between. Share your affections. Voice your feelings. Leave your mark.

+ Reply to Thread
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. I hate when merchants lie to me.
    By oranges in forum Commission Junction - CJ
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: November 11th, 2009, 08:13 AM
  2. Quantcast - Why do you lie?
    By sfcom in forum Marketing Resources & Power Tools
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: September 8th, 2008, 09:14 PM
  3. Can I lie to Visitors to get them to Click Through?
    By gkudasz in forum Commission Junction - CJ
    Replies: 52
    Last Post: June 28th, 2004, 08:58 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •