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  1. #1
    Troll Killer and best Snooper!
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    Rhea's Avatar
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    Folks don't go for a stroll on garbage night.

    http://www.timesunion.com/aspstories...storyID=252200

    The county doesn't post "Deer Crossing" signs because it's just assumed.

    A deer dies on your property and you have to call the State Police to find out how to get rid of the carcass because your town doesn't have a police department, never mind an Animal Control Officer.

    There are no street lights within 3 miles of your house.

  2. #2
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    ..the local guide leads the mighty hunters around the forest for days until he figures they're running out of beer & money. Then he leads them to his garbage dump 100 yards from the campground & they shoot a grazing bear.

    Wayne

  3. #3
    Troll Killer and best Snooper!
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    ...all the dogs in the neighborhood start howling and you realize it would be prudent to go indoors.

  4. #4
    Super Sh!t Stirrer SSanf's Avatar
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    When your outdoor circle has defunct washing machines for quarter altars...
    When the cakes and wine are done with a bowie-knife, a can of Foster's and Little Debbie's...
    When your ritual music includes Johnny Cash singing "Ring of Fire"...
    When you think the Wiccan Rede is good for making twig furniture...
    When you believe a pentagram is a Western Union message to 5 people...
    When your Goddess picture says "Miss September" at the bottom...
    When your God statue looks a little too much like Elvis Presley...
    When your Holy Wine comes in a mason jar ...
    When you hold Esbats at Billy Bobs Bar and Grille...
    If you have cast a love spell on livestock......

    (No offense to folks living in the country who I am pretty sure do NOT consider themselves a separate ethnic group. Gotcha!......)
    Comments are opinion unless otherwise noted. Remember, pillage first. Then burn. Half of all people in the world have IQs under 100. You best learn to trust ol' SSanf!

  5. #5
    ABW Ambassador Andy's Avatar
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    ...Oliver and Lisa Douglas are your neighbors.

    Andy

  6. #6
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    ....you can't get pizza delivery

  7. #7
    Troll Killer and best Snooper!
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    I wouldn't mind Oliver and Lisa Douglas so much. I *do* mind the various incarnations of Larry, Darryl and Darryl who keep turning up.

    We can get pizza delivery; we can't get delivery of The New York Times.

    But the thing that makes me craziest is that the nearest supermarket-sized health food store is a 2.5 hour drive away. You can however buy a 60 ounce jug of sausage in pickling brine at the local supermarket. :shudder:

  8. #8
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    Some of these work the other way, I live in a nice small village surrounded by ghetto and then the lake to the north. No pizza delivery, the super-market we go to is 30 minutes away by freeway. Yet we are 5 minutes from downtown cleveland. And also 2 minutes from the beverage store that mainly sells single cigarettes and 40s of malt liquor.

    Chet

  9. #9
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    <BLOCKQUOTE class="ip-ubbcode-quote"><font size="-1">quote:</font><HR>We can get pizza delivery; we can't get delivery of The New York Times. <HR></BLOCKQUOTE>
    When I first started coming up here, I asked the guy in the general store if he could save a Sunday New York Times for me. "Sure," he said. "What time can I pick it up?" I asked. "Wednesday."

    Wayne

  10. #10
    Troll Killer and best Snooper!
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    In defense of living in the country (because I don't want it to seem as if I hate it) I have to say that it is abso-freaking beautiful here.

    And it's wonderfully quiet, too, except for Wednesday afternoons and Sunday mornings when the local yahoos get together at the Fish and Gun Club for their shooting matches.

  11. #11
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    Several stables within walking distance and a five minute drive to see sheep and a llama blissfully grazing.

    But I am 2 minutes from a Super Walmart and there are many places that will deliver pizza...

    Don't care about the New York Times


    Guess I've got the best of both worlds... citified when I want it and rural when I need it!!!
    CharPaula
    Staying focused on the bottomline

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