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  1. #1
    Full Member ADesertRose's Avatar
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    January 19th, 2005
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    Lost my aunt this weekend...
    Terrible weekend...my aunt passed Thursday night. Had to rush to my sisters, cause she was there visiting and died on their couch and my sister had to leave her there for HOURS while waiting for them to pronounce and make arrangements for transport.

    Relatives went against her wishes and had her embalmed and made ceremony arrangements after we had already arranged cremation.

    I am supposed to be her executor and the relatives that live by her have already been through her stuff, to her office and have double locked her apartment door so I have no access!

    Not much more stress can possible happen at this point...hope you all are having a better holiday weekend than me!

    My only peace is that I am saying goodbye in my own way and opening myself to recognizing her wonderful spirit when next we meet!

    Better wishes to you all!

  2. #2
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ADesertRose
    Terrible weekend...my aunt passed Thursday night. Had to rush to my sisters, cause she was there visiting and died on their couch and my sister had to leave her there for HOURS while waiting for them to pronounce and make arrangements for transport.

    Relatives went against her wishes and had her embalmed and made ceremony arrangements after we had already arranged cremation.

    I am supposed to be her executor and the relatives that live by her have already been through her stuff, to her office and have double locked her apartment door so I have no access!

    Not much more stress can possible happen at this point...hope you all are having a better holiday weekend than me!

    My only peace is that I am saying goodbye in my own way and opening myself to recognizing her wonderful spirit when next we meet!

    Better wishes to you all!

    Wow - Amazing how death brings out the worst in people. Good luck with the greed monsters. Maybe time to call an attorney, especially your Aunt's attorney if she had one so you can carry out her wishes as she had planned.

    Hang in there DesertRose.
    Peace,

    Rexanne

    Rexanne.com
    Loving Everyone's Child Creates Magic


  3. #3
    ABW Ambassador Ron Bechdolt's Avatar
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    I am so sorry for your loss and your stress with the realitives. Having lost my dad to cancer several weeks ago I can understand, but I can't imagine how much more painful it must be with all the trouble the other realatives are causing.
    Ron Bechdolt | Affiliate Program Management Consultant
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  4. #4
    AM Navigator Geno Prussakov's Avatar
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    ADesertRose,

    Please accept my heartfelt condolences.

    Geno

  5. #5
    ABW Ambassador AddHandler's Avatar
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    ADesertRose - My Sincere condolences to you and your family.

  6. #6
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    I am so sorry for your loss. This kind of situation happens in all families in one way or another. May God Bless you during this sad and stressful time.

  7. #7
    ABW Ambassador Andy's Avatar
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    ADesertRose, I'm so sorry to hear about the death of your Aunt.

    I'm doubly sorry to hear about the difficulties with your relatives. Abiding by the final wishes of a loved one is the last thing we can do for them here on Earth. Those wishes should be respected and honored. It's really shameful how some people act during difficult times.

  8. #8
    Newbie bjmalone's Avatar
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    Please accept my sympathy on the loss of your aunt. Will be praying for your strength as you deal with this trying time and even more trying relatives.

  9. #9
    ABW Ambassador JudiMoore's Avatar
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    I'm sorry for your loss. I also know from experience how stressful it can be when families add to the hurt and sorrow by acting out. Just keep moving through and keep your Aunt close to your own quiet thoughts. It will help both of you.

  10. #10
    ABW Ambassador meadowmufn's Avatar
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    My sincerest condolences on your loss and especially the difficult times you're having with relatives. I'm glad your aunt had someone like you, that realized the really important things in life. Material things are meaningless. It's the wonderful spirits you are fortunate to know in life that really make it all worth it. I just wish more people realized that.

    -M

  11. #11
    Content $ Queen Ebudae's Avatar
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    ADesertRose, my heart and prayers to you and your family.

    I am sorry you are having to deal with family members acting like that. I have has that happen in my family as well. Just hold tight to your memories, they can't take that away from you.
    Ebudae


  12. #12
    Senior Affiliate Manager AMWSO James - AMWSO's Avatar
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    ADesertRose my heart goes out to you...It's incredible how close family can behave this way. This is something that I've unfortunately had experience with myself...
    James D. Nardell
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  13. #13
    Affiliate Manager harrymond's Avatar
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    ADesert Rose,
    my hearty condolences to you and your family.
    Cheers,

    Harry.
    Mondera Affiliate Manager
    http://www.mondera.com/affiliate_support/
    Winner of the LinkShare 2004 Golden Link Awards "Affiliate's Choice Award"
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  14. #14
    Dream Cruise megatonloh's Avatar
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    ADesertRose

    My sincere condolences to you and your family. Stay cool, if everything are done correctly, the law will be on your side.

  15. #15
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    Unhappy So sorry...
    Adeser Rose,

    I am truly sorry for your loss. I just lost a brother a few montha back and I know how you feel.

  16. #16
    Resident Genius and Staunch Capitalist Leader's Avatar
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    My condolences.

    And, well wishes in your endeavors to get your aunt's wishes followed--and in breaking that *^%*% door down (by using the law, or just your foot...)! Get a good lawyer, if possible, and don't let the vultures railroad you.
    There is no knowledge that is not power. ~Hemingway

  17. #17
    Domain Addict / Formerly known as elbowcreek Thomas A. Rice's Avatar
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    I am really sorry for your loss, and the trouble with your relatives. I've been through something similar with some of my relatives a couple years ago: ended up, in fact, with one relative dumping 17 30 gallon bags of trash on my porch. Only help I can offer is to say that it is important to retain your balance and cool, and find a way to keep the family talking, because, after the heat of the moment, they will still be your relatives 10 years from now.
    Following everyone else is a GREAT way to become average.

  18. #18
    Member Streaatz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by James - JobsInSports
    ADesertRose my heart goes out to you...It's incredible how close family can behave this way. This is something that I've unfortunately had experience with myself...
    Very well said James... I too have experience in this and it stinks.

    ADesertRose, you have an incredible attitude about this... "My only peace is that I am saying goodbye in my own way and opening myself to recognizing her wonderful spirit when next we meet!" You made this about HER, not about the "family" and what they are doing. My heart goes out to you.

    Streaatz

  19. #19
    Member hooligan's Avatar
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    Terribly sorry to hear of your loss. My thoughts and prayers go out to you.

  20. #20
    Affiliate Manager Raphie_B's Avatar
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    So sorry for your loss...

    I found this poem helpful when faced with a recent loss... thought perhaps you might find it comforting as well...

    Do not stand at my grave and weep,
    I am not there, I do not sleep.

    I am a thousand winds that blow.
    I am the diamond glint on snow.
    I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
    I am the gentle autumn rain.

    When you wake in the morning hush,
    I am the swift, uplifting rush
    Of quiet birds in circling flight.
    I am the soft starlight at night.

    Do not stand at my grave and weep.
    I am not there, I do not sleep.
    Do not stand at my grave and cry.
    I am not there, I did not die

  21. #21
    Super Sh!t Stirrer SSanf's Avatar
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    I am so sorry for the heartache and grief you are feeling.

    I wish we could help but only time can do that.

    Chin up and may tomorrow be a better day.
    Comments are opinion unless otherwise noted. Remember, pillage first. Then burn. Half of all people in the world have IQs under 100. You best learn to trust ol' SSanf!

  22. #22
    Outsourced Program Manager e-Gazer's Avatar
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    So sorry to hear about your loss.

    It's amazing what can split a family into pieces sometimes - and there are two surefire ways to do it. Have a wedding, or have someone pass away. Guaranteed to heat a good argument over something or other.

    Keep positive thoughts about you like those you expressed in your initial post to start this thread - about how you are opening yourself to recognizing her wonderful spirit when next you meet. Those are the types of thoughts that will help get you through this period of loss and mourning.

    Unfortunately everyone reacts to emotional events in different ways - some react in anger, some in frustration, some without thought to what others want or need, etc. etc.

    You will get through. My thoughts are with you.

  23. #23
    Outsourced Program Manager e-Gazer's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Raphie_B
    So sorry for your loss...

    I found this poem helpful when faced with a recent loss... thought perhaps you might find it comforting as well...

    Do not stand at my grave and weep,
    I am not there, I do not sleep.

    I am a thousand winds that blow.
    I am the diamond glint on snow.
    I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
    I am the gentle autumn rain.

    When you wake in the morning hush,
    I am the swift, uplifting rush
    Of quiet birds in circling flight.
    I am the soft starlight at night.

    Do not stand at my grave and weep.
    I am not there, I do not sleep.
    Do not stand at my grave and cry.
    I am not there, I did not die
    Beautiful piece Raphie - thank you for sharing it. This is something that we can all appreciate in a time of loss, or anytime at all.

  24. #24
    Newbie
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    Hey AdesertRose,

    I'm sorry for your loss and sympathize with your situation with your relatives. Make sure you stay safe, money makes people do strange things. Where I come from it's tradition for the oldest male child to inherit all the property and when my Dad passed 20 yrs ago, my uncles tried to "eliminate me" (even sadder I had no clue what was going on, I was 5 yrs old). Just goes to show you that money/property can create monsters

  25. #25
    Analytics Dude Kevin's Avatar
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    So sorry to hear.... We're thinking of you.

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