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  1. #1
    Full Member Deb's Avatar
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    January 19th, 2005
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    Things to Ponder . . .
    Just a few things to ponder
    in your spare time
    . . .

    If people can have triplets and quadruplets why not singlets and doublets?

    Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.

    One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

    If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?

    The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

    I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

    Could it be that all those trick-or-treaters wearing sheets aren't going as ghosts but as mattresses?

    If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?

    If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?

    If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

    Is there another word for synonym?

    Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?

    Where do forest rangers go "to get away from it all"?

    What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?

    If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?

    Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

    Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?

    If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

    Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

    Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?

    If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?

    Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines?

    How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign?

    Why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

    Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

  2. #2
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
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    "If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?"

    Oh no no no no no - too early to think about this!

    "If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?"

    LOL
    Peace,

    Rexanne

    Rexanne.com
    Loving Everyone's Child Creates Magic


  3. #3
    Canadienne extraordinaire Susan's Avatar
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    "If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?"

    Yes dammit!

    "The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live."

    ohhhhh so that's who it was!!!!

    Susan Arts
    Senior Vice President, Marketing
    Moxy Media

  4. #4
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Susan_ShareResults

    "The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live."

    ohhhhh so that's who it was!!!!

    Unaccounted for midnight visit, Susan? LOL LOL
    Peace,

    Rexanne

    Rexanne.com
    Loving Everyone's Child Creates Magic


  5. #5
    pph Expert! Gordon's Avatar
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    some really good ones there Deb.
    One day parasites and their ilk will be made illegal, I bet a few Lawyers will be pissed off when the day comes.
    Mr. Spitzer is fetching it nearer

    YouTrek

  6. #6
    Full Member Deb's Avatar
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    Thanks, Gordon. I thought they were worth sharing. And, I just knew I'd find someone here that had some of the answers to the questions.

  7. #7
    Canadienne extraordinaire Susan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rexanne
    Unaccounted for midnight visit, Susan? LOL LOL


    Uhuh...gotta stop that if I'm going to quit

    :-)
    Susan Arts
    Senior Vice President, Marketing
    Moxy Media

  8. #8
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Susan_ShareResults
    Uhuh...gotta stop that if I'm going to quit

    :-)
    LOL - or maybe invite Santa over more often so withdrawals won't be so all-consuming.
    Peace,

    Rexanne

    Rexanne.com
    Loving Everyone's Child Creates Magic


  9. #9
    Canadienne extraordinaire Susan's Avatar
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    Have sled, will travel...yep, I think that's the better way Rexanne :-)
    Susan Arts
    Senior Vice President, Marketing
    Moxy Media

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