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  1. #1
    Crazy like a fox suzigeek's Avatar
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    Daughters first day at school...
    This morning I put my daughter on the school bus for her first day at kindergarten. I didn't realize how hard it would be for me! This is the first she'll be gone all day. In preschool it was only 3 hours twice a week and I picked her up and dropped her off.

    I don't like handing her off to a bunch of people I hardly know ...

    Upside is me and my son (he's younger) get to spend more one on one time...but it doesn't feel right w/out his sister....
    Suz~~GearGirl~~

  2. #2
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    Hey Suzi, I know exactly how you feel, only with dogs. I spend so much time at home with our dogs that when they go to the groomer's for the day (and that only happens once every 8 weeks) I mope around the house until it's time to pick them up.

    Being a mom has its ups-and-downs, huh?

    I hope your daughter has some cute stories to tell you when she gets home and lots of hugs and kisses.

  3. #3
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    Aww... it's kind of sad, almost like the official end of babyhood.

    She'll love it, kindergarten is fun.

  4. #4
    ABW Ambassador MoneyBusiness's Avatar
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    I'm not a parent (or married even), but I can almost picture the day where I have to send off my son, or daughter, to their first day of school - scary but proud I would say!

  5. #5
    The Eternal Optimist zimmy's Avatar
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    She is going to have so much fun in kindergarten. I bet when she gets off the bus she'll be bubbling with excitement and stories to share with you.

    When my oldest was ready to enter kindergarten I found out the bus ride was 45 minutes one way. That wasn''t happening. There was no way in this world I was putting my 5 year old on a bus every day for 1 1/2 hours. Uh uh.

    I couldn't do the drive because I had 3 year old twins at home and I was very pregnant. I wasn't about to pack everyone up 2x a day to drive to the school.

    So...we started homeschooling and are still doing it 7 years later.



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  6. #6
    ABW Ambassador Ron Bechdolt's Avatar
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    It does become less worriesome as they get older, but still sad. Today my youngest started his first day of middle school (and a 6:40 am bus), next youngest started his first day of high school. Still have two others, one in high school and one in college. Just happy to see them at home each night (but rarely at the same time).
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  7. #7
    What's the word? Rhia7's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by suzigeek
    This morning I put my daughter on the school bus for her first day at kindergarten. I didn't realize how hard it would be for me!
    At that age socialization is very important. It will be good for your daughter to interact with lots of children her age
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  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by 7-days
    It does become less worriesome as they get older,

    I am not so sure about that. My wife and I delivered her son to the University last week-end. He couldn't wait for us to leave.

    My daughter returned to her college a week ago. At least, she telephones me 2 or 3 times each week.

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  9. #9
    Crazy like a fox suzigeek's Avatar
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    Zimmy, Home schooling is something I'm definetliy considering but after kindergarten or first grade.(her bus ride is short) I want her to meet other kids she LOVES to socialize. You have your own nieghborhood right in your own house!

    We haven't met too many (as in none!) other kids her age in our nieghborhood since I seem to be the only stay at home Mom around these parts. This morning I discover there are 4 other girls her age just practically around the corner! I have never seen these kids before!

    Anyway my Hubby just called from work and he's feeling down too. I think I'm mostly regreting I didn't get to give her a big hug b4 she got on the bus because things were kind of confusing with all the kids meeting each other and parents snapping pix. I'll feel MUCH better when she gets home!
    Suz~~GearGirl~~

  10. #10
    Crazy like a fox suzigeek's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 7-days
    Today my youngest started his first day of middle school (and a 6:40 am bus),
    That in itself would make me homeschool(if possible)....to me that's just too early for kids(and me! lol). How can they even focus in the morning. I guess the can snooze on the bus.

    Hey Suzi, I know exactly how you feel, only with dogs. I spend so much time at home with our dogs that when they go to the groomer's for the day (and that only happens once every 8 weeks) I mope around the house until it's time to pick them up.
    Thats the kicker we are ALWAYS together. Me and hubby have MAYBE had grandparents sit for them less than 5 times since they came into being! We definitely are a always together family.

    It will be exciting to hear her stories when she gets home! Or she'll probably come home and I'll say so how was school and she'll say fine, and I'll say what happened today? and she'll say "I don't feel like talking about it right now Mom". End of conversation.
    Suz~~GearGirl~~

  11. #11
    The Eternal Optimist zimmy's Avatar
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    Zimmy, Home schooling is something I'm definetliy considering but after kindergarten or first grade.(her bus ride is short) I want her to meet other kids she LOVES to socialize. You have your own nieghborhood right in your own house!
    Yeah, homeschooling is definitely a choice each family has to make for themselves. We have 5 kids so they do have each other to play with, but we also stay really active in our homeschool group and lessons with other homeschoolers. That is one of the criticisms we hear most about homeschooling. But I love my kids more than any other person in this world, so I'll always do best by them. (in my opinion anyway! ) It is nice when they get older - my oldest is in 7th grade and I am so glad that he is home with me. I know what I started doing in junior high with the new kids I met. Scary stuff - I don't want my boys doing that.

    That is why each family has to pick what is right - it takes commitment.

    Glad you found some neighbors with kids her age - now she'll be wanting to play with them all the time! When she comes home from school I bet she'll be so excited for tomorrow - she won't be able to wait to go back. Kindergarten is so FUN!!



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  12. #12
    Crazy like a fox suzigeek's Avatar
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    my oldest is in 7th grade and I am so glad that he is home with me. I know what I started doing in junior high with the new kids I met.
    ain't that the truth! I started right about then and put my parents through hell and back again (I never went to mainstream highschool). Hopefully things with my kids won't be as dramatic(fingers crossed). I rebeled hard against a mother who is an imigrant and an iron fist. My poor mom...the fights we had. Thank goodness those days are long gone!!

    Kindergarten is so FUN!!
    I hope so. Kindergarten has changed since I was there. She has 22 kids in her class!! and its a full day. I think they are supposed to be reading by the time they are out of kindergarten. This is the first year at her school they are testing their academic skills. For gosh sakes let the kids play!!

    I'm sure she'll love it though she has been practicing school for a couple of years now.
    Suz~~GearGirl~~

  13. #13
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by suzigeek
    This morning I put my daughter on the school bus for her first day at kindergarten. I didn't realize how hard it would be for me! This is the first she'll be gone all day. In preschool it was only 3 hours twice a week and I picked her up and dropped her off.

    I don't like handing her off to a bunch of people I hardly know ...

    Upside is me and my son (he's younger) get to spend more one on one time...but it doesn't feel right w/out his sister....
    OMG Suzi - this post made me - It's a big moment and doesn't get easier when you send her to college either, just a little less scary turing her over to "strangers." *sigh*

    Meanwhile, enjoy the solo time with your son. He'll thrive and your daughter will be having a great time. You just gotta get past the fear. She'll be fine and in good hands.
    Peace,

    Rexanne

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  14. #14
    Crazy like a fox suzigeek's Avatar
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    Yeah she's home now and had a good day but I think she brought some attitude back w/her . Not the sweet miss manners I sent of this morning....we'll have to work on that...she's prolly just tired too.

    Anyway thanks all. I'm still feeling weird about the seperation but maybe thats part of being a parent .

    p.s. me and the little guy played with his new big wheel today w/out big sis trying to finagle it from him. It was nice...
    Suz~~GearGirl~~

  15. #15
    Outsourced Program Manager tmartini's Avatar
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    I remember Alex's first day of kindergarten as being one of the happiest days of my life. She didn't start until April (exactly one year after her 2nd Cord Blood Transplant), but she made up for lost time quickly.



    Now with my son Nick (who's 3) I'm already dreading it. He's a lot more "spirited" (yeh that's the word!) than Alex!

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  16. #16
    ABW Ambassador danay's Avatar
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    Suzi, don't forget to ask the teacher about coming in and helping out. If she accepts parent helpers, you can volunteer once a week.

    This will allow you to keep a good eye on her once in a while and you will still be involved with her and her classmates. Not to mention, the teacher may really appreciate it.

    I miss my little munchkin every day and I'm totally psyched about picking him up every night.
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  17. #17
    Resident Genius and Staunch Capitalist Leader's Avatar
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    If I ever have kids (*shudder*) I know one thing, I won't send them to the wild-animal pen called school!! Every time these subjects come up, I wish there was homeschooling when I was school-age. In a sadistic twist of fate, it became legal here approximately the year AFTER I graduated!

    Quote Originally Posted by Rhia7
    At that age socialization is very important. It will be good for your daughter to interact with lots of children her age
    "Socialization" n.
    To either conform, or be harrassed by the idiots (aka "other kids") in the class. I must disagree with the common consensus that it's anything good. The GOOD lessons about society can be learned without exposure to such an environment.

    Case in point:
    Quote Originally Posted by Suzigeek
    I think she brought some attitude back w/her
    Good grief! She's learning how to act like a %$*&$ rotter already and it's only been one day! And in the social-Darwinistic environment of schools, those who don't learn how to be a jerk get teased!

    Needless to say, I wish I could have avoided the entire experience, from K all the way through 12. I still remember kindergarten, too--I thought I had been dropped into Hell itself, or at best a zooful of vicious animals!

    Added: Didn't mean to rain on your parade, SG, but school is a real sore spot with me.

  18. #18
    Crazy like a fox suzigeek's Avatar
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    Suzi, don't forget to ask the teacher about coming in and helping out. If she accepts parent helpers, you can volunteer once a week.
    Exactly what I was thinking about doing . This morning my daughter said she didn't want to go to school becuase she was having a hard time at lunch - it was too noisy and there was a mean lady that clapped her hands and told the children to be quiet. She also was having a hard time finding a spot to sit in. She said she wanted to go back to preschool where everyone was nice.She went to the YMCA and there were only 8 kids in her class w/2 teachers, now there is 22 kids w/one teacher!

    Anyway I'd like to spend a day there and see what exactly goes on since I'm unclear about many things. I volunteered at her preschool quite abit and really enjoyed it. Part of me feels like this isn't what kindergartners should be experiencing, and part of me knows I'm a little over protective.

    Didn't mean to rain on your parade, SG, but school is a real sore spot with me.
    Believe me your not raining on my parade! after elementary I was never a mainstrem student. They never knew what to do with me. I never attended a day of regular highschool. I was put in alternative school and then I went to nightschool. Me and my hubby are both Artists by nature and trade so we are not fit in the box types although lately we've been trying and unfortunately I don't think its our cup of tea, but for now its doable.

    We've always thought about homeschooling but I thought I'd do kindergarten to give me a small break, spend time with my son, and introduce her to other kids. Kids have to experience some difficulties or else they won't grow or know how to handle any proplems/stress. I'm just not sure how much and at what age.

    I'll be seeing how it goes. I'll give it a semester before I flip and try something else.
    Suz~~GearGirl~~

  19. #19
    ABW Ambassador danay's Avatar
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    Hey Suzie,

    Howe are things progressing with school? Are you starting to get into the groove of hte new schedule now?

    My oldest couldn't wake up without me yelling "WAKE UP" until the 2nd week. Hmmm, now that I think of it, I had to yell all last year.
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  20. #20
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by danay

    My oldest couldn't wake up without me yelling "WAKE UP" until the 2nd week. Hmmm, now that I think of it, I had to yell all last year.
    The irony is that when they're babies, we try to get them to "sleep through the night." and then trying to get teenagers to WAKE UP is futile. LMAO - Parenthood sucks, plain and simple. Good thing "love 'em until it hurts" is born with them or we'd never let them live long enough make it to high school.

    Suz, your daughter is probably already loving "school" and growing up before your eyes. I, too, would love to hear how she (and YOU) are doing.
    Peace,

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  21. #21
    Resident Genius and Staunch Capitalist Leader's Avatar
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    Edit: Ooh, this got long! Oh well...

    Quote Originally Posted by SuziGeek
    They never knew what to do with me. I never attended a day of regular highschool. I was put in alternative school and then I went to nightschool.
    They didn't know what to do with me, either, but the arrogant and inflexible School Administration's idea of an answer was to try to make the square peg go into the round hole despite the fact that it obviously never would!

    I did manage to ditch the last year of high school in a similar way to the way you did--but only after they were informed that I would be leaving their regular gristmill at 16, one way or the other. Rather than mess up their vaunted low-low dropout rate, they finally made a concession for that year.

    This morning my daughter said she didn't want to go to school becuase she was having a hard time at lunch - it was too noisy and there was a mean lady that clapped her hands and told the children to be quiet. She also was having a hard time finding a spot to sit in.
    Her description of lunch sounds right on the money.

    The seating trouble is a result of Social Darwinism in progress. A grand example of animal-instinct behavior (they're establishing the pecking order. And if she can't find a seat, she's coming out on the low end.). There is never enough room, so kids have to pretty much squash in and make themselves a spot. Nobody will admit that they can move over a tad! So anyone who can't intimidate them into doing so can be SOL. And to a kindergartener, a table full of kids sitting 4 inches from each other can look like an impenetrable wall.

    The "mean lady," that's the Lunch Lady (or, more officially, the Lunchroom Supervisor) who keeps all the animals from killing/hurting each other. At lunch when I went, there were several grades served at once, but that may not include the kindergarteners (but if your daughter's having a hard time finding a place to sit, they probably have more than one class in the lunchroom. Or they have 22 kids at table which should only hold 20.)

    Usually the Lunch Lady's duties are: trying to lower the noise level, which, quite seriously, is EXTREMELY loud despite her attempts.
    and
    Stopping food fights (there probably haven't been any of those yet, but ya never know. Kindergarteners usually don't do that, though.).

    But on rare occasion, something serious happens: Some kid will trip and bang his head, someone will start to act up in a serious way, etc. Then the Lunch Lady gets to deal with that. But she's useless for handling things like getting the new kid a spot to sit.

    In other words, they are basically paid killjoys who don't help for the day-to-day misery where they really could, but will get your kid to the school nurse if need be.

    We've always thought about homeschooling but I thought I'd do kindergarten to give me a small break, spend time with my son, and introduce her to other kids. Kids have to experience some difficulties or else they won't grow or know how to handle any proplems/stress. I'm just not sure how much and at what age.
    IMO just enough to know that school sucks (so they don't think they're "missing out") should be enough! Of course, if they never think it sucks, then what the heck, might as well let them go...

    As for experiencing some difficulties, you're right, they need to know that there are *******s out there and hopefully what to do about them. The problem is, regular schooling provides a mega-dose of them. It's like getting a 2-gallon dose of medicine when a couple of tablespoons would be enough.

    Some other social activites, which don't entail the poor kid being stuck in a rotten situation for several hours running, 5 days a week, I'm sure would provide enough opportunity for socialization (as long as they're not *so* structured that nothing socially challenging ever comes up).

    When it comes to the age, I don't think I learned anything much about social nonsense in kindergarten. I knew they were some kind of 2-legged animals who only looked human, and tried to avoid them as much as possible! I knew that one kid BIT another one, took a chunk right out of his arm--and the teacher acted like it was almost normal!
    I would never, ever, sit on the carpet with the rest of the group (I stayed way to the back), lest I catch whatever they must have had to make them act that way (yes, at 5 I truly thought it was contagious--a disease!). Nor would I dare to nap. Needless to say, staying the hell away from them didn't teach me how to get along with 'em (as if I wanted to...which I didn't. I didn't want to catch their crazy!)

    As for learning ways of dealing with the hordes...school failed miserably on educating me on that. I was the picked-on kid all through grade school, and the later grades, while an improvement, weren't "good" either.

    When it comes to ways to be NICE, how to act like a reasonable person, how to "diplomatically" disagree, etc., I learned that from adults. No kids knew, and the schoolteachers didn't even try to teach it beyond the barest basics (like don't beat each other up).

    Going to my mother's workplace (when she was stuck doing empl*yment) in the summer did me a lot more good for knowing what to expect in terms of behavior in the ADULT world.

    But it was only by actually entering the adult world, as an adult, that I started learning things that would really help me socially. I never saw any use for knowing how to deal with the immature ones as a peer. I never considered myself their peer! THEY were animals, vicious and unthinking. *I* was not any of that.

    Some schoolish behaviors persist in adults, but the paradigm of acceptable behavior and manifstations thereof, for respectable adults, is so much different than that of school that even the persistent behaviors are done on a much more sophisticated level.

    Granted, I did learn to watch out for a lot of dirty tricks and psychological games that mean people like to pull, and can spot some of them even from the distance of outer space. But even though that's indeed very valuable information, I don't think it was worth 13 years of hell (K-12) to get it.

  22. #22
    ABW Ambassador danay's Avatar
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    wow leader, I'm sorry school sucked that much for ya.

    I had a rough first few years, since we were immigrants when I started kindergarten and was just learning to speak English. I did eventually deal with it in my own way, but you never forget the kids who picked on you.

    Life does take care of it all somehow. In my case, Kharma kicked alot of people's arses. I hope you're are achieving more happiness and success than the idiots who picked on you.

    Kids are great and wonderful little human beings when the parents teach them to be that way.
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  23. #23
    Resident Genius and Staunch Capitalist Leader's Avatar
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    wow leader, I'm sorry school sucked that much for ya.
    Me too!
    And to think, this was (and still is) supposed to be a "good" school district. I shudder to think of what the "bad" ones are like.

    We had all the trappings...new or recent-enough books, classroom heating, low crime, reasonably knowledgeable teachers (with a few exceptions)...which produces good results on the booklearning front. But they didn't do a thing to actually train the rotters to be decent human beings. Those of us who were decent anyway were left to be fodder for the animals!

    Life does take care of it all somehow. In my case, Kharma kicked alot of people's arses. I hope you're are achieving more happiness and success than the idiots who picked on you.
    I'm sure I'm happier and more successful than them; they are the type of people who have no big dreams. So they probably just went after lousy low-class jobs and are wasting their lives looking at someone else's cement factory walls. But out of the few I've had the misfortune of more contact with, I only know for sure that *some* of them have been properly Karmatized--into welfare lines.

    But then, I certainly don't try to keep in touch them! Rather, I try to avoid the types of places I'd expect them to be (no loss to me--such types wouldn't hang out anywhere classy...) So, the only time I find out what happened to any of them is when I actually bump into one in a store or somewhere.

  24. #24
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Leader

    We had all the trappings...new or recent-enough books, classroom heating, low crime, reasonably knowledgeable teachers (with a few exceptions)...which produces good results on the booklearning front. But they didn't do a thing to actually train the rotters to be decent human beings.
    I could go off on a particular rant that's near and dear to my heart but I won't. ;-)

    Parents need to teach their kids how to be decent human beings. School is for academics but I'd love to see schools teach kids the "basics" of being "nice." It's rule #1 in our house: Just be nice - everything else isn't nearly as important." And it works. I have 2 great kids. And they're not boring people either. LOL
    Peace,

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  25. #25
    Crazy like a fox suzigeek's Avatar
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    Well...She is adjusting alright but yesterday I was seriously looking at alternatives for 2nd semester.

    Talk about growing up before your eyes!! ...lets see...She came home yesterday and told me all about her friend who has a boyfriend she was "DATING" but he broke up with her and this little girl really misses him....oh and yeah they KISS each other Mom....

    WTF!!! I remember having little pretend weddings and such but the way she was describing this situation it sounded like a love sick teenager. Anyway I tried to suggest that maybe this little girl wasn't being so truthful and just talking and my daughter agreed and said she was happy she(my daughter) was just a regular kid and didn't have to think about stuff like that!

    Her Dad dropped her off at school yesterday and didn't like what he saw. Her school is just for Kindergarten and First grade so they have like 400 Kindergartners and 1st graders...I just don't understand that system. And yes she has a full blown cafeteria experience with about a hundred other kids but I think each class sits at there own table.

    I'd love to see schools teach kids the "basics" of being "nice."
    I believe in that philosophy. My kids are not the biters or sand/bark throwers, toy grabbers that seem to be prevalant at the parks now days. They are well mannered little people. I was raised the same way...and I had my share of bullies but the karmic wheel has dealt them theirs I'm sure of it.


    So I looked into some private schools and homeschooling and such...we'll see.

    Where I grew up it was a mixed bag of rough kids (Chicago) and I learned how to deal with it. Luckily she has no problems waking up when she needs to. I just wish there was SOME one on one time w/her tacher, so far she says she's had none.

    The saga shall continue...
    Suz~~GearGirl~~

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