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  1. #1
    ABW Ambassador
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    The Guys' Rules---
    We always hear "the rules" From the female side.

    Now here are the rules from the male side.

    Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

    1. Men are NOT mind readers.

    1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
    You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
    We need it up, you need it down.
    You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

    1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
    or the changing of the tides.
    Let it be.

    1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
    And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

    1. Crying is blackmail.

    1. Ask for what you want.
    Let us be clear on this one:
    Subtle hints do not work!
    Strong hints do not work!
    Obvious hints do not work!
    Just say it!

    1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

    1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
    Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

    1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.
    See a doctor.

    1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
    In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

    1. If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.

    1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
    Don't ask us.

    1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of them makes you sad or angry, then we meant the other one.

    1. You can either ask us to do something
    Or tell us how you want it done.
    Not both.
    If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

    1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

    1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

    1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
    Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
    We have no idea what mauve is.

    1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

    1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing is wrong.
    We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we know you will bring it up again later.

    1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

    1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

    1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
    or golf.

    1. You have enough clothes.

    1. You have too many shoes.

    1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

    1. Thank you for reading this.

    Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


    But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

  2. #2
    http and a telephoto
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    Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


    But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
    I like sleeping on the couch.... and I'm not a guy.
    Deborah Carney
    TeamLoxly.com BookGoodies.com ABCsPlus.com

  3. #3
    AM Navigator Geno Prussakov's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Ward
    ...I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

  4. #4
    Resident Genius and Staunch Capitalist Leader's Avatar
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    Talking
    1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
    Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
    1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing is wrong.
    We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we know you will bring it up again later.
    I do these too. It's not just men!

    1. You have too many shoes.
    1 pair of shoes is too many??
    Funny, I think so too, but there's these darned "no shoes, no service" policies. Plus, it snows in MI about half the year. That can get hard on bare feet!

  5. #5
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
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    January 18th, 2005
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    LOL - love these
    Peace,

    Rexanne

    Rexanne.com
    Loving Everyone's Child Creates Magic


  6. #6
    Millionaire on training wheels Justdoit's Avatar
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    January 18th, 2005
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    I showed this list to my boyfriend and he agreed with every single one of those points. He is now spending the evening not enjoying my company but the company of our dog in the garage.. It's not so bad it's heated down there, has a ton of tools, and tons of broken things he can fixed while he is banished for the evening..

  7. #7
    general fuq mrbshouse's Avatar
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    best chuckle of the week....headed to the couch now

  8. #8
    Network Rep & ABW Ambassador Carolyn - ShareASale's Avatar
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    Right, and I can BET I know what Mrs. Adam Ward had to say about that!!!

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