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  1. #1
    Network Rep & ABW Ambassador Carolyn - ShareASale's Avatar
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    Things that make you go hmm...
    This was forwarded to me by ShareASale Support

    Things to think about that you probably have never thought about and will never think about again;


    Can you cry under water?
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    How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
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    Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
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    Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
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    Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
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    What disease did cured ham actually have?
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    How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
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    Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
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    If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
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    Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
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    Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
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    Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
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    Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural
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    Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
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    If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
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    Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
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    If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
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    Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!
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    If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?
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    If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
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    If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
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    Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
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    Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
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    Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
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    Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?

  2. #2
    Ride It Like You Stole It CowgirlUp's Avatar
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    Those are hysterical!!!

    And yes, I sang the two songs roflmao
    Be the change you want to see in the world ~ Gandhi

  3. #3
    ABW Ambassador meadowmufn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Carolyn - ShareASale
    This was forwarded to me by ShareASale Support

    Things to think about that you probably have never thought about and will never think about again;



    Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"?

    Obviously because your opinion is worth more to you than other people.
    -Don't criticize anyone til you've walked a mile in their shoes. Then when you do criticize them, you'll be a mile away and have their shoes.
    - Silence is golden. Duct Tape is silver.

  4. #4
    Network Rep & ABW Ambassador Carolyn - ShareASale's Avatar
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    My two favorites are:

    If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

    and

    If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

    heheheeh

  5. #5
    Internet Cowboy
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    Hemmorhoids are not called asteroids, because if they were your proctologist would be an astronaut!

  6. #6
    Network Rep & ABW Ambassador Carolyn - ShareASale's Avatar
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    Lol!!

  7. #7
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Carolyn - ShareASale

    Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?
    LOL
    Peace,

    Rexanne

    Rexanne.com
    Loving Everyone's Child Creates Magic


  8. #8
    Ride It Like You Stole It CowgirlUp's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by UncleScooter
    Hemmorhoids are not called asteroids, because if they were your proctologist would be an astronaut!
    Oh, now there's a visual proctologist with a sun visored helmet
    Be the change you want to see in the world ~ Gandhi

  9. #9
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    Some one has way too much time on their hands. However having all of the sayings listed, as they are, I would vote for, "If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?" as a favorite. It appears we reach that point a little more daily!

  10. #10
    Member Mitty's Avatar
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    My fav is about carpool lane and hearse LOL

  11. #11
    general fuq mrbshouse's Avatar
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    Thanks for the Laugh :-)

    my fav is the 2 cents....i guess that is the difference between what is said and understood :-)~

  12. #12
    Resident Genius and Staunch Capitalist Leader's Avatar
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    Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
    Taxes!

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