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  1. #1
    ABW Ambassador Sam Bay's Avatar
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    January 18th, 2005
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    Talking First ABW Roast - Don't Read If You're Weak
    Here we go. I unofficially introduce first ABW Roast. Stuff I think about some of you guys and gals that I can only say inside the safety box of "roast". But, in reality, I like you, all off you.

    Write your own and post it here.


    Flamingo World:
    "I used come here for useful disccussions, some things happened and I went away not come back again. But, now I am just here to post useless stuff for fun, play games with Anne and Scooter, and relax. There is nothing I want to teach you and there is nothing I'll learn from any of you. Especially you, Snib"

    Trust
    "Does posting latest affiliate news make me more important? Sorry, I have nothing better to do. I am not a technical person, and I refused to be, even though I know I need to be"

    Leader
    " I am about 40, no husband, no kids.Yay, more time to play games and post away at ABW. My no-content-sales-pages have started suck now, but no worries, I am selling bulbs now. My Florida plans, are still plans."

    Haiko
    "No cigarettes, not enough food; no wonder I've been so temperate lately. But, I have a georgous wife. Seriously guys, this is last time with the applesauce and horsehockey. Don't use my forum to promote your sh!t, without my permission, or arrghhh"

    Geno Prussakov
    "I will send post after post just to keep my thread on the top. Don't be surprised if you see thread I started reaches 100 replies and 98 of them from me. Also, I'll scrape the content off ABW with polls and questions, and package it as a book and sell it back to you. Now that's Russian-smart! Oh I have lovely wife and daughter."

    Noth
    "I will never say what I truly mean. I will just follow anything, bend to anything. "

    Loxly
    "Mee too, mee too, mee too"

    Ecomcity
    "Am I dead?"

    Rexanne
    "Everthing is nice, eveyrbody is nice, I'll support you, feed the fish, la la la la"

    AmeritrustRX
    "There is no thread safe from advertising my signature. I will talk about anything, many times just to get my 6-line signature in. Oh, also I am old."

    Kelli B
    "I am smart. Very much so. Read what I write and you'll understand that."

    Carolyn - ShareASale
    "Brian is so cool. Shareasale is so cool. Our merchants are so cool. We are so cool. Brrrg."

    Brian Littleton
    "I am a smart, ethical, decently handsome businessman and everybody loves me. I play the piano and sing well, too. Eat it guys!"

    Andy Rodriguez
    "If I wasn't doing this, I'd be a used car salesman"

    Jorge - Jrami
    "I want to be Andy Rodriguez 2.0"

    HardwareGeek
    "Seriously guys and gals, you have no idea how cool I am"

    Snib
    "You guys are sooo late to all the new internet trends. If I wasn't here keep you updated, you'd be in Internet Stoneage"

    Chetf
    "Let me know when the conversation get intelligent enough to warrant my participation"

    Ben Edelman
    "I am an expert at how damaging adwar/spyware is but I use eBates for my cashback shopping"

    Donuts
    "Eat me; I am affilicious"

    Shawn Collins
    "Am I loved and respected here at ABW or what?

  2. #2
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
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    January 18th, 2005
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    LOL Sam
    Peace,

    Rexanne

    Rexanne.com
    Loving Everyone's Child Creates Magic


  3. #3
    Moderator MichaelColey's Avatar
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    January 18th, 2005
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    Sam Bay
    "I'm really asking for it by roasting 21 members, yet misspelling First!"
    Michael Coley
    Amazing-Bargains.com
     Affiliate Tips | Merchant Best Practices | Affiliate Friendly? | Couponing | CPA Networks? | ABW Tips | Activating Affiliates
    "Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world." Nelson Mandela

  4. #4
    Internet Cowboy
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    January 18th, 2005
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    I don't know if I should be flattered or upset that I escaped Sam's "wrath".

    I love it Sam. On a few of these you HIT THE NAIL ON THE HEAD!!!!

    Certainly someone will get pissed. Maybe there will be a big fight.



    Maybe it would be even more fun if we write the slam and let the members match it up for themselves. That way we could REALLY write what we REALLY feel.


  5. #5
    Mama in Charge Anne's Avatar
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    January 18th, 2005
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    Virginia
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    2,780
    Quote Originally Posted by UncleScooter
    Maybe it would be even more fun if we write the slam and let the members match it up for themselves. That way we could REALLY write what we REALLY feel.
    Um, are you trying to tell me something Scooter?
    hehehe!

  6. #6
    Troll Killer and best Snooper!
    I decide when the pigs fly!
    Rhea's Avatar
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    January 18th, 2005
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    New York, USA
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    Ooh I'm LAFFING and I'm feeling GUILTY for LAFFING!!! Sam you are awesome at parody. I hope you have a parody web site.

    Scoots, I'm gonna assume that not being included in Sam's roast is a GOOD thing. (I think it probably just means that we're not boringly predictable.)

    But hey, Sam, if you come up with anything wicked on me I promise I'll take it in good humor. Then I'll have to kill you.

  7. #7
    Lite On The Do, Heavy On The Nuts Donuts's Avatar
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    January 18th, 2005
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    Winter Park, FL
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    Excellent!!! Hahahahaa!!! Funny! I thought the Geno and Snib ones were perfect!!!

    Since roasting is supposed to be edgy (mine's not harsh! shucks!), I invite everyone I've ever shat upon and those that are still patiently waiting for it, to bump mine up several notches on the harsh, yet insightful scale.

    Sam, you've gotta do Scooter, Missy W, Anne / CleverMom, Michael Coley and some others... please.

  8. #8
    OPM and Moderator Chuck Hamrick's Avatar
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    This is a welcomed break from all the serious stuff and a welcomed laugh. Sam you rock

  9. #9
    Network Rep & ABW Ambassador Carolyn - ShareASale's Avatar
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    September 6th, 2005
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    Brian is not cool!!!

    (But yeah, I think ShareASale is. )

  10. #10
    ABW Ambassador Ron Bechdolt's Avatar
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    January 18th, 2005
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    Affiliateville, USA
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    7,927
    Well, I was just heading out but watching the stuff hit the fan here in a few moments might be more entertaining.

  11. #11
    Troll Killer and best Snooper!
    I decide when the pigs fly!
    Rhea's Avatar
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    January 18th, 2005
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    New York, USA
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    What do you mean, "Brian isn't cool!?!"

    My world is crumbling! I gotta believe that somebody in this industry is cool and I was kinda counting on it being Brian. Well except for the golf thing but I was prepared to give him a pass on that one.

  12. #12
    ABW Ambassador netnow22's Avatar
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    January 18th, 2005
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    lol

  13. #13
    ABW Founder Haiko de Poel, Jr.'s Avatar
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    January 18th, 2005
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    New York
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    Absolutely perfect - I love it!
    Continued Success,

    Haiko
    The secret of success is constancy of purpose ~ Disraeli

  14. #14
    ABW Ambassador writerguy's Avatar
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    January 17th, 2005
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    Springfield, Missouri, USA
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sam Bay
    Ecomcity
    "Am I dead?"
    Been awhile since Mike and the Duck posted anything here, hasn't it? You don't suppose he, uh, really IS dead, do ya? Miss him.

    Gary the Writerguy

  15. #15
    Troll Killer and best Snooper!
    I decide when the pigs fly!
    Rhea's Avatar
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    January 18th, 2005
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    New York, USA
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    Ooh, Haiko made a sticky! Woohoo!

  16. #16
    ABW Ambassador meadowmufn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rhea
    What do you mean, "Brian isn't cool!?!"

    My world is crumbling! I gotta believe that somebody in this industry is cool and I was kinda counting on it being Brian. Well except for the golf thing but I was prepared to give him a pass on that one.
    Carolyn is cool. She knows Pussycat Billy and the ABW Hot Boys.
    -Don't criticize anyone til you've walked a mile in their shoes. Then when you do criticize them, you'll be a mile away and have their shoes.
    - Silence is golden. Duct Tape is silver.

  17. #17
    Affiliate Manager 1av8r's Avatar
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    July 29th, 2005
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    Hahahahahhahaha

  18. #18
    Affiliate Summit Guy Shawn Collins's Avatar
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    January 18th, 2005
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    Austin, TX
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    I started one on Missy, but then remembered she's being roasted in person in Miami the day before Affiliate Summit, so I need to save my "A" material.
    Affiliate Summit - Las Vegas on January 10-12, 2016

  19. #19
    Affiliate Manager Alan Hamilton's Avatar
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    March 13th, 2006
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    Colorado / Florida
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    Wow, good thing CBS doesn't own ABW or you'd be rooming with Imus!! Great Jabs Sam, but *Dude* - the signature stays!! I may even add a few more lines!!
    Join the Spicy Aprons Affiliate program on ShareASale Visit us on Facebook www.facebook.com/spicyaprons Follow us on Twitter @Spicyaprons

  20. #20
    Affiliate Manager Alan Hamilton's Avatar
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    Sam, good effort for a "FIRT" try!!
    Join the Spicy Aprons Affiliate program on ShareASale Visit us on Facebook www.facebook.com/spicyaprons Follow us on Twitter @Spicyaprons

  21. #21
    The slot machine that IS paid! Billy Kay's Avatar
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    January 18th, 2005
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    Sam...

    Stop posting PUBLICLY what I'm thinking PRIVATELY

  22. #22
    Mama in Charge Anne's Avatar
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    January 18th, 2005
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    Quote Originally Posted by Donuts
    Sam, you've gotta do Scooter, Missy W, Anne / CleverMom, Michael Coley and some others... please.
    Only a sick, sick man would go on this way...

    Begging for sheer humiliation at the expense of countless innocents...

    And you call yourself a yummy donut?

  23. #23
    ABW Ambassador
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    Who is Sam Bay?

    "It is seen as a great honor be roasted"

    "But the overall tone of any true roast is supposed to be admiration and congratulations."

    "Anyone who is honored in such a way is said to have been "roasted"."

    Who is Sam Bay? An admirer.

    "Originally Posted by Donuts
    Sam, you've gotta do Scooter, Missy W, Anne / CleverMom, Michael Coley and some others... please."

    For real, you have to do those guys too. It's disrespectful if you don't.

  24. #24
    ABW Ambassador AffiliateSummitMissy's Avatar
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    October 9th, 2006
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shawn Collins
    I started one on Missy, but then remembered she's being roasted in person in Miami the day before Affiliate Summit, so I need to save my "A" material.
    Feel free to not work on any material and miss the dinner. It's ok, I grant you a hall pass. In fact, how about you stay back and stuff attendee bags

    -Missy
    Shine on,


    Missy Ward

    Co-founder of Affiliate Summit, FeedFront Magazine , GeekCast.fm & itsaWAHMthing.com
    Co-Publisher of Revenews.com and Revenews.org
    Founder of AffiliateMarketersGiveBack.com Personal Blog: MissyWard.com

  25. #25
    Outsourced Program Manager Affiliate Eagle's Avatar
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    I just want to echo what many have said. Some of these are right on the money. I guess I havent been here long enough to get roasted, but I did enjoy reading this thread....LOL
    Emilio Yepez
    Affiliate Program Manager
    www.lighthouseinternetmedia.com
    PH: 305 389 8955
    AIM: affiliateagle
    Email: emilio@lighthouseinternetmedia.com
    Follow Me On My Twitter


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