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August 1st, 2007, 11:48 AM #1Late Night Hillary Jokes
Hillary Clinton said that her childhood dream was to be an Olympic athlete.
But she was not athletic enough. She said she wanted to be an astronaut,
but at the time they didn't take women. She said she wanted to go into
medicine, but hospitals made her woozy. Should she be telling people this
story? I mean she's basically saying she wants to be president because she
can't do anything else." --Jay Leno
"Well, the big story -- Hillary Clinton will be running for president in
2008. You know why I think she's running? I think she finally wants to see
what it's like to sleep in the president's bed."
"Top Democrats have mixed feelings about Sen. Hillary Clinton running for
president. Apparently, some Democrats don't like the idea, while others
hate it." --Conan O'Brien
"In a fiery speech this weekend, Hillary Clinton wondered why President Bush
can't find the tallest man in Afghanistan . Probably for the same reason
she couldn't find the fattest intern under the desk." --Jay Leno
"Former President Bill Clinton said that if his wife, Hillary, is elected
president, he will do whatever she wants. You know Bill Clinton -- when he
makes a vow to Hillary, you can take that to the bank." --Jay Leno
A student from the University of Washington has sold his soul on eBay for
$400. He's a law student, so he probably doesn't need it, but still, that's
not very much. Today, Hillary Clinton said, 'Hey, at least I got some
furniture and a Senate seat for mine." -Jay Leno
"Hillary Clinton said today that she wants legislation to allow all
ex-felons to vote. See, this way all the Clinton 's former business
partners can vote for her in 2008." --Jay Leno
Hillary Clinton's 506-page memoirs have come out. So much of her
personality shines through, that in the end, you, too, will want to sleep
with an intern." --Craig Kilborn
In Hillary Clinton's new book 'Living History,' Hillary details what it was
like meeting Bill Clinton, falling in love with him, getting married, and
living a passionate, wonderful life as husband and wife. Then on page two,
the trouble starts." - Jay Leno
"In the book, she says when Bill told her he was having an affair, she said
"I could hardly breathe, I was gulping for air. No, I'm sorry, that's what
Monica said." - David Letterman
"Hillary Clinton, our junior senator from New York , announced that she has
no intentions of ever, ever running for office of the President of the
United States . Her husband, Bill Clinton, is bitterly disappointed. He is
crushed. There go his dreams of becoming a two-impeachment family."
- David Letterman
"Last night, Senator Hillary Clinton hosted her first party in her new home
in Washington . People said it was a lot like the parties she used to host
at the White House. In fact, even the furniture was the same." - Jay Leno
"Senator Hillary Clinton is attacking President Bush for breaking his
campaign promise to cut carbon dioxide emissions, saying a promise made, a
promise broken. And then out of habit, she demanded that Bush spend the
night on the couch." - Craig Kilborn
"CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America .
Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her
because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it." - Jay Leno
"Hillary Clinton is the junior senator from the great state of New York .
When they swore her in, she used the Clinton family Bible. . .the one with
only seven commandments." -David Letterman
August 1st, 2007, 11:50 AM #2
- Join Date
- January 18th, 2005
- Nunya, Business
Here we go
August 1st, 2007, 11:56 AM #3
- Join Date
- January 18th, 2005
Apparently some moderators at ABW are allowed to do things that they prohibit others from doing.
To that end:
Q: How many George Bush clones does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None...because he is so stupid and so screwed into the christian right that he can't detach himself long enough to do anything but get more of our soldiers killed for no reason! HaHaHaHaHa
August 1st, 2007, 12:06 PM #4
We've had this discussion before. Political humor is allowed in the Daily Chuckle forum. Political discussion related to affiliate marketing is allowed. General, non-controversial, non-divisive political discussion is allowed.
If you have any doubt, you can find all of these political jokes here:
- President Bush Impersonation - 2006 Press Corrrespondents Dinner
- Bush Tragedy
- Another political and slightly nawty one...
- Osama's Message ...
- What is a tragedy?
- Morning talks in the Oval Office
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