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  1. #1
    Grandma broke her coccyx! Uncle Rico's Avatar
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    I Need a Do-Over!
    I stopped to smell the roses or rotting fish, however you tend to look at things recently and realized if I get anything else added to my plate, something is going to happen. Unfortunately, that something won't be a good thing.

    At times I feel trapped, owned, broke, stepped on, help-less, angry, depessed, and that's just before noon. It's one of those, if I knew way back when what I know now, I sure would do things differently.

    I have come to realize that the choices you make early on in life both financially and personally can and will ruin the entire rest of your life. Some things in my life are good, but the majority just SUCK!

    Today was one of those days where trying to get up out of bed just wasn't going to be easy from a mental perspective. Atleast I have my health! I wonder when people say that they are including their mental health.

  2. #2
    Affiliate Manager Howard Gottlieb's Avatar
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    Seymour I am so sorry you are down. We will keep you in our prayers today!
    I would rather live my life as if there is a God and die
    to find out there isn't, than live my life as if there
    isn't and die to find out there is.

  3. #3
    Lite On The Do, Heavy On The Nuts Donuts's Avatar
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    I chatted with the committee and your do-over request has been granted. Welcome to the very first day of the rest of your life.

  4. #4
    Beachy Bill's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Donuts
    I chatted with the committee and your do-over request has been granted. Welcome to the very first day of the rest of your life.
    Best wishes on making it a good one. It can be done.
    Bill / Marketing Blog @ 12PM - Current project: Resurrecting my "baby" at South Baltimore..
    Cute Personal Checks and Business Checks
    If you are too busy to laugh you are too busy.

  5. #5
    Grandma broke her coccyx! Uncle Rico's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Donuts
    I chatted with the committee and your do-over request has been granted. Welcome to the very first day of the rest of your life.
    If only it were that easy.

  6. #6
    ABW Ambassador Lanadili's Avatar
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    Seymour,

    I remember reading something awhile back about negative thoughts, negative energy, etc and what all it can do to a person. Bascially it was saying if your feeling crappy, crappy things will happen to you. Also, just the opposite is true, if your feeling good, good things will happen to you. It's all about how you perceive the world, and how you look at things.

    Get out of the negative thinking and get off your butt and do something positive, and think positive while your doing it. This nonsense about making the wrong choices will change the rest of your life for the worse is total bs if you ask me. You can also make choices that will change your life in a very positive way.

    Sounds like you need a day to just get out and enjoy life. Do something you haven't done in awhile that you really enjoy doing.

  7. #7
    http and a telephoto
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    Deborah Carney
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  8. #8
    ABW Ambassador meadowmufn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SeymourButts
    At times I feel trapped, owned, broke, stepped on, help-less, angry, depessed, and that's just before noon. It's one of those, if I knew way back when what I know now, I sure would do things differently.
    Been there, done that, Seymour. I know it's hard to stay positive when you're overwhelmed with those feelings. When I've been in situations in my life where I felt like that, I've learned that the best way to deal with it is a little at a time... a day at a time or even just 15 minutes at a time. If nothing positive in your life is happening, MAKE something positive happen. Take a break and have a good time at some fun activity you enjoy and make some happy memories. (I recently took up bowling again. There's nothing like taking your frustrations out on 10 little defenseless pins. LOL.)

    As far as your affiliate marketing business, I know when I get to feeling trapped, I want to work on my sites, but I want to do too much all at once and get overwhelmed. Break it down into small tasks. Create a page about red widgets, update your blue widget page with the latest styles and get rid of all the out of stock items, write an article on the importance of regular maintenance of your widgets, research a new niche and compile a list of keywords either for SEO or PPC. All those small tasks will eventually add up to a big accomplishment. It won't happen overnight. It'll take time. So patience is required, which is difficult when you're feeling trapped.

    You'll get where you want to be someday, Seymour. You have the ambition. Just try to maintain focus and be patient. I'm rooting you on because I'm in the same boat, more or less... trying to get into AM full time and quit the day j*b.
    -Don't criticize anyone til you've walked a mile in their shoes. Then when you do criticize them, you'll be a mile away and have their shoes.
    - Silence is golden. Duct Tape is silver.

  9. #9
    Moderator BurgerBoy's Avatar
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    SeymourButts

    I know how you feel sometimes.

    In fact it's made me develope a new theory about gravity.

    There is no such thing as gravity.

    The world sucks - that's what keeps us here - not gravity.

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  10. #10
    Affiliate Network Rep Kim Salvino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Donuts
    I chatted with the committee and your do-over request has been granted. Welcome to the very first day of the rest of your life.
    I love this!!! I'm going to keep it on file should I have this request.

    Seymour -

    It's gotta get better if it can't get any worse. Heed other's advice and take the much needed break, do something for yourself, do something for someone else that really needs it, etc.

    Not sure if you have a Chick-fil-A nearby, but I would be happy to send you the $6.50 for a chicken nugget meal. Those nuggets, sweet tea and waffle fries have a way of making me smile on the worst of days. Seriously, PM me if you can do this. It would be my pleasure to cover it.

    Take care of yourself.
    Kim Salvino, Client Services Director, Performance Horizon Group
    Reach me at kim.salvino(at)performancehorizon.com or on (443) 617-4036

  11. #11
    http and a telephoto
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    Quote Originally Posted by SeymourButts
    Some things in my life are good, but the majority just SUCK!

    Today was one of those days where trying to get up out of bed just wasn't going to be easy from a mental perspective.
    I was just reflecting about the last year of my life. I was having many more days like you are back then. It can get better. Listen to your friends, take time to talk to them, or to write a journal, or just go somewhere and sit and NOT think....
    Deborah Carney
    TeamLoxly.com BookGoodies.com ABCsPlus.com

  12. #12
    Troll Killer and best Snooper!
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    We all have days like that, Seymour. Everybody gets angry or sad sometimes, but if you're feeling angry or sad MOST of the time then it's time to get professional counseling. Talk therapy helps some people but folks with a brain chemistry imbalance can benefit from pharmaceutical intervention. There's no shame in that. Your biggest clue that you're in trouble is if your thinking becomes circular. If you're in a thought loop and you can't shake it you need to get help.

    I hope you feel better soon.

  13. #13
    Grandma broke her coccyx! Uncle Rico's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lanadili
    Seymour,
    This nonsense about making the wrong choices will change the rest of your life for the worse is total bs if you ask me.
    Fair enough. Everyone is certainly entitiled to any opinion. I could give examples where this is indeed very true, but I would prefer not to.

  14. #14
    Roll Tide mobilebadboy's Avatar
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    Preacher, meet choir.

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  15. #15
    What's the word? Rhia7's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SeymourButts
    I have come to realize that the choices you make early on in life both financially and personally can and will ruin the entire rest of your life.
    If the choices were educational, you can always take classes at a community college -- in fact taking a course might be a way of meeting new people and getting the brain cells thinking in a new direction

    I've often noticed your sarcastic sense of humor and I appreciate it
    Get in touch with some friends who really make you laugh and you'll see that things (while they could be better) aren't that bad.

    When life gives you lemons, make lemonade
    ~Rhia7 -- Remember the 7
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  16. #16
    Grandma broke her coccyx! Uncle Rico's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rhia7
    If the choices were educational, you can always take classes at a community college -- in fact taking a course might be a way of meeting new people and getting the brain cells thinking in a new direction
    Well, my wife and I are both college grads. Education is not the problem. I can't imagine having to go back to college.

  17. #17
    What's the word? Rhia7's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SeymourButts
    Well, my wife and I are both college grads. Education is not the problem. I can't imagine having to go back to college.
    A college degree doesn't exclude you from taking a course in a different subject area that you might find interesting -- it is a way to meet other people.

    You might also consider some type of community involvement; otherwise, mingle with the people who understand you best and who can offer a positive light on whatever it is you are going through.
    ~Rhia7 -- Remember the 7
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  18. #18
    Moderator MichaelColey's Avatar
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    Sometimes, you don't get a do-over. If you jump off a 10-story building and change your mind halfway down, you still have some very serious consequences to face really quickly. You can't go back and change what you've already done. Life's just like that. Everything we do has consequences, and none of us make perfect decisions every time.

    Most of the time, however, you can pick up the pieces, put things back together, learn from your mistakes, and move on.

    Whatever mistakes you've made, don't let them go to waste. Learn from them. Figure out what's important to you and what isn't. Figure out what you can change and what you can't. Figure out what you need to do differently. Let go of those things aren't important. Change those things you can. Don't dwell on those things that are unimportant or that you can't change. Do what you need to do, and press forward. While you probably can't make things perfect, you can probably make them considerably better.

    A lot of things take time. Debt, for instance. If you've made poor financial decisions in the past, it almost always takes longer to get out of a financial mess than it took to get into it. Set goals, work towards those goals, and look forward to your goals.
    Michael Coley
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    "Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world." Nelson Mandela

  19. #19
    Troll Killer and best Snooper!
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    Rhea's Avatar
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    Or you could just reinvent yourself. I've done that a couple of times. Got rid of a husband who was making me miserable. Found one that made me happy. Went back to college and got a degree. Changed careers. Changed the scenery. Doing nothing is the worst thing you can do.

    You know that saying, "The definition of insanity is doing the same things and expecting different results?" Figure out what you need to do to get better results. Maybe a visit to a career counselor would help. Feeling trapped is the worst feeling I know.

  20. #20
    Affiliate Manager BeachBDM's Avatar
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    I am so sorry you are feeling down. The best advice I was given some time ago is, I can start my day over at any point, even if its late in the day. Beyond that, I wouldnt nor can I change the mistakes I have made for they have made me the person I am today. (Which by the way I think is for the better). If I also remember my past and my mistakes, but NOT dwell on them, I am less likely to repeat them.

    And if all else fails...I PRAY!

    I wish you a better day!

    Sandee
    Sandra Martin
    sandeebottom at hotmail.com

  21. #21
    ABW Ambassador meadowmufn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MichaelColey
    A lot of things take time. Debt, for instance. If you've made poor financial decisions in the past, it almost always takes longer to get out of a financial mess than it took to get into it. Set goals, work towards those goals, and look forward to your goals.
    Speaking of which, after my hubby and I got married we accumulated a ton of debt. We both had modest credit card balances, plus we both had been living at home so we needed furniture, kitchen things, etc, etc.. No cash to pay for them, so we put it on credit. Add on top of that costly car repairs, medical expenses, and a lot of other unexpected expenses, and you have a mountain of credit card debt. Fortunately, we had the means to make payments on time and maintain good credit while slowly chipping away at that mountain. I'm proud to say that it will all be paid off this month! Woo hoo! To celebrate, the hubby and I will be going out to dinner... and paying CASH. LOL.

    Still, I shudder to think how much closer to our goal of working from home and financial freedom we'd be if we hadn't had to pay so much in interest payments. I don't dwell on that though because I can't do anything about it now. All I can do is look to the future and work with what I've got.

    There are times in your life when things seem hopeless and overwhelming. But if you focus, take things a step at a time, and strive to make good, positive decisions, you'll overcome that mountain. Like Coley said, it'll take longer to conquer the mountain than it took to build it, but it can be done. In our case, we used bulldozers to build the mountain and teacups to tear it down. LOL.
    -Don't criticize anyone til you've walked a mile in their shoes. Then when you do criticize them, you'll be a mile away and have their shoes.
    - Silence is golden. Duct Tape is silver.

  22. #22
    Life is Supposed to be Fun! Rexanne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by meadowmufn
    Take a break and have a good time at some fun activity you enjoy and make some happy memories. (I recently took up bowling again. There's nothing like taking your frustrations out on 10 little defenseless pins. LOL.)
    My first thought when reading your original post Seymour was: "Go bowling!"

    So,, you've now got 2 votes to go bowling. :-) It'll be fun, mindless and take your mind off the challenges.

    "This, too, shall pass" ... and it will.

    Meanwhile, sorry to hear you're having such a bad day. Laughter will do you a world of good. A movie I keep on hand to turn my perspective around is Rat Race. Makes me LOL, which is medicine.

    Another good one: Think of everyone else's problems and decide which are worse ... you'll probably pick your own over thiers every time.

    And "taking action" is probably the best advice. Do something to change your life for the better, even if it's just going out and buying a new toothbrush. You are the one with the power to change things.

    And a big ol helps.
    Peace,

    Rexanne

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  23. #23
    Affiliate Manager Howard Gottlieb's Avatar
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    Seymour, let me share a thought. Too many people spend time looking around focusing on people around them and how much more some of those people have. It seems its easy to see what we don't have. But take a harder look. The odds are you have so much more positive than most people around you. If you can't see it you might need to look harder.

    I for one have read your posts and feel confident you will be fine. As I said before my family and I will pray for you and keep you in our thoughts!
    I would rather live my life as if there is a God and die
    to find out there isn't, than live my life as if there
    isn't and die to find out there is.

  24. #24
    ABW Ambassador meadowmufn's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by visitourmall
    I for one have read your posts and feel confident you will be fine. As I said before my family and I will pray for you and keep you in our thoughts!
    Ditto.

    One more thing I'd like to share. Having a plan and tracking your progress can do a world of good. Figure out your monthly expenses and decide on how much of a cushion you'd need in order to do AM full time. Decide how much monthly income from AM you'd like to have before you quit your job. In other words, figure out your "exit criteria". Then plot your progress towards it.

    Hubby and I did that and we're about a third of the way there. If the holiday season goes as well as last year, we'll be 2/3rds of the way there by the end of the year. Progress towards the goal keeps us trudging along at our day j*bs dreaming of a better day.
    -Don't criticize anyone til you've walked a mile in their shoes. Then when you do criticize them, you'll be a mile away and have their shoes.
    - Silence is golden. Duct Tape is silver.

  25. #25
    ABW Ambassador JudiMoore's Avatar
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    Sometimes just knowing that you can post about the rough days and have all your friends jump in to say "I'm here for ya, buddy!" really helps. Even when our best wishes for you are tainted with unasked for advice and cockeyed optimism, it has to feel good to know it's possible to reach out and touch someone, just like good ol' Ma Bell taught us so many years ago.

    Life can really suck sometimes and then sometimes it doesn't. Take the good ones, throw the bad ones overboard and keep on going.

    Don't try and do your do-over today! Take the rest of the day off and just try again tonight when everyone else is sleeping.

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